Hybrid Thoughts

This blog is officially closed!

2009-11-11T21:02:00.003-05:00

It's been exactly a year since I posted. I'm overwhelmed with updating another blog, which is more important to me. That blog details my new life as an adoptive parent of three little adorable children.

I will no longer be posting on this blog. I'm keeping it only for my own self. One day I may delete it.

Thank you for checking in.

Wassup - Eight Years Later...

2008-11-12T20:50:00.001-05:00

Rest in peace

2008-11-06T21:06:00.001-05:00

I'm totally shocked at learning that Michael Crichton died yesterday from a battle with cancer. I'm deeply saddened by it because I absolutely LOVE his books, and I make it a point to check if there are any new books every time I visit the bookstore. Now, I'll feel an empty space as I go through my routine check for his shelf and realise there will be no more new books from him.

He's one of my favourite authors. One of a handful.

Rest in peace, Mr. Crichton. Thank you for writing the most wonderfully imaginative books I've ever read. I will really miss reading more from you.

My First Elections

2008-11-02T19:02:00.001-05:00

This is a real catchy tune and cute kids, too!

It's a boy, it's a girl, it's a boy

2008-10-13T12:32:00.003-04:00

As you all gathered, I've been terribly busy lately.

This will very likely be my last post before I disavow any connection to this blog in fear of my children finding out.

Yesterday my husband and I said "yes" to the adoption of three adorable siblings.

It's a boy (6)
It's a girl (4.5)
It's a boy (3 - TODAY!)

I've been busy updating my private blog on the adoption process for the past nine months. If you've been reading this blog for a while, you're more than welcome to drop me an email if you'd like to follow up on my private blog. It's only by invite due to privacy laws.

It's been a fun journey with this blog. It kept me busy during many hours of boredom.

I will now be spending my hours of boredom catching up on sleep.

Thank you all for visiting!

Spam email

2008-09-28T22:20:00.005-04:00

Every so often I get spam in my inbox that doesn't go directly into my spam folder. I got one this week that intrigued me, so I decided to respond back.

Here's the original email:

From: franklin brown <ruptures@wanadoo.fr>
Date: Thu, Sep 25, 2008 at 1:44 PM
Subject: PLEASE HELP ME
To: undisclosed-recipients

I am Franklin Brown son of Mr Kassim M.Brown Diamond exporter in freetown, Sierra leone.althought my father died recently and he has contacts in the miners clubs in the Uk of whom i can not contact because i lost the sheet of paper on which his name and contact details were written and i have always wanted to be a Rotarian.

Am currently in Dubai in the United Arab emirate because my uncle triedto take my life because of two boxes filled with diamonds that my late father left behind.So i shipped the boxes down to Dubai because its theonly place i could go without visa problems and the boxes are here in the airport waiting to be cleared of which i don't have the means to clear them.I want you to help me in this regard so we can clear and sell the diamonds anduse the money to help people in need all over the world.I am hoping to hear from you in this regard.

Franklin

Well, I felt really bad for the guy, so I responded back:

Dude, I am SO sorry, but I won't be able to help a brother out. I've got my own two boxes with diamonds from the guy from Nigeria who promised me a nice inheritance. I'm still waiting for him to come pick up his shit.

I eagerly await his response.

Hey, has anyone seen Burn After Reading? Since I live here in DC and work with the government I found this movie absolutely hilarious. I highly recommend it to all my readers!

Premature Hot Flashes

2008-09-27T21:42:00.003-04:00

Four more months before I turn 40 and my body has decided it's time to make history again. Back in 1979 I made history by being the youngest child diagnosed with Crohn's disease in South Africa. And now I'm about to be a typical case of premature menopause caused by an autoimmune disease.

At least that's what I suspect these hot flashes are all about.

My conversation with my husband last night:
Mybrid: "I called for a doctor's appointment. I've been having some serious hot flashes past few days and I think it's menopause. It just came out of no-where. No alerts, no notices."
Ybrid [knocking on the wall]: "Hello, I'm menopause, I'm here to see you."
Mybrid: "Idiot!"
Ybrid: "Now I TOLD you not to answer the door when someone knocks and only answer when they ring the bell!"

My conversation with my husband this morning before going shopping:
Mybrid: "What's the weather like outside?"
Ybrid: "Ummmm...is this a trick question?"
Mybrid: "Oh yeah. Never mind. Doesn't matter anyway. Forget it!"

I know some women are ashamed of talking about this in public or even mentioning hot flashes, as if there's a stigma that once you get them you're way old and are closer to death than to being alive. But hey, I don't care. I already have Osteoporosis, so why not Menopause.

Here's to some exciting posts about the thrill of going through hot flashes in my late 30's.

Now would someone open a window or something?!

Time Off

2008-09-20T14:15:00.000-04:00

I'm sure you've all noticed I hardly update my blog. My personal life is taking a huge toll on my time and I can no longer find time to sit across a computer, let alone post on a blog.

I do miss reading everyone's blogs and commenting, but I just have no time.

I'm not closing this blog entirely, but I will no longer feel obliged to post every so often. I'll just post when I feel like it.

Thank you everyone for coming by and reading my boring posts so far.

A Scientist and a Rapper

2008-09-01T05:43:00.001-04:00

If this were my daughter, I'd be SO PROUD!!!

Heck, I think all lessons should be taught like this.

America's Got Talent

2008-08-26T21:39:00.010-04:00

I don't know why I stayed up to watch this show, maybe just curiosity after watching the ads during the Olympics, but I was delighted to find the DC Cowboys get this far on a national show.

I saw them perform in DC during the Gay Parade in June 2006. Loved them! Or maybe I should say, loved watching their bodies...

There's nothing sexier than a good looking guy dancing half naked!

With a Little Help...

2008-07-06T13:16:00.001-04:00

Israeli singers

2008-06-17T17:45:00.000-04:00

Believe it or not, but they don't sing only in Hebrew.

http://www.myspace.com/triadisrael

Today is "Dec. 14, 2007"

2008-06-09T16:50:00.001-04:00

Nine months after starting my new job and being told that the project I was put in charge of is due for completion on Dec. 14th, 2007 - the project is complete!

Well, okay, not entirely. Just Phase II. But this is the phase that everyone has been asking about for an entire YEAR!!! It's the part where a population of several hundreds has asked - "When do we get to eat proper food and not a bag of chips?"!

After a week of waking up at 4:30am, including this past Saturday and Sunday - the dining facility opened up this morning.

Only problem was that we honestly did NOT plan to open a huge building with only one air conditioner on the hottest day of the year at 98 degrees. We planned on opening it on June 9th. Who knew?! Needless to say that my success was slightly trodden over by the excessive heat in the building and the constant barrage of complaints.

But, on the plus side - it's DONE! I finished the most critical phase of the project, and I pushed the contractor to get it done to MY level of perfection (poor soul!).

Admittedly, none of it was without a tremendous amount of frustration and phone calls to higher ups along the management chain, but I'm just happy it's over with. For now.

If I could write here all my frustrations from this past week, it'd fill an entire blog. It would also get my blood pressure back up on a really hot day in a very hot computer room. So instead I'll focus on the good things.

You know how they always show sexy construction workers on TV? The muscled toned guys, with the one million dollar smile? Yeah, well, that's in Hollywood. Out here, in the DC metropolitan area, you get the short and wide Latino guys who are shorter than me. I swear I have nothing against Latinos other than the fact that the ones on my jobsite are short and nothing to look at. But anyway, I digress. Last week, in an effort to get my project done to my satisfaction, the contractor company sent a new guy in. A drop dead gorgeous guy! I've been finding excuses to drop by the jobsite and take a Fanta break.

I wouldn't have mentioned this guy if it was just his looks, but he turned out to be the absolutely best construction worker I've ever come across as far as quality of work, communications, professionalism, you name it! The guy is absolutely outstanding. He moved in to the area two months ago from Detroit because of lack of work and got shafted by joining this dud of a construction company and was made superintendent overnight, probably because they noticed right away that this millwork guy also has brains.

At least my last few days on this project have been a little more enjoyable in having to deal with not only a competent construction worker, but with someone who is easy on the eyes.

I actually reached a point where I was going to text my husband and ask for his permission to flirt with the guy. But then thought better of it, because I knew my husband was busy playing Indiana Jones Lego on PlayStation and would very likely complain about me asking a stupid question since I should already know his answer.

So I flirted. Or..hmmm...I suppose it's MY version of flirting. I bought him three bottles of water today because I felt bad for him working out in this horrendously unforgiving sun in 98 degrees as he fixed a gazebo.

In my next phase of flirting, I gave him my business card and told him to call me. I had a good and innocent reason for it. I swear.

Then I saved him the call, by simply introducing him to my boss and asking my boss to use his contacts with other construction companies and get him the fuck out of this freaking construction company he fell into and to a better company that will appreciate what they got!

I think tomorrow instead of a Fanta break, I'll offer him a diet coke.

Where does the time fly?

2008-06-03T17:45:00.001-04:00

I think it was a week ago when I celebrated New Year's, and then a day later it was Passover, and now summer is almost over. I have no clue where time if flying, or what on earth I'm doing with my time.

My life is consumed by...life. It's as simple as that. All of a sudden I have a ton of things to do with my free time. Ranging from visiting friends, through cleaning my house. Of course it helps that my health recently has been outstanding. Needless to say, I live every day to its fullest and try to do everything possible in one day. I have a lot to make up for.

In the last tally of friends who had kids or are pregnant, this is where I am:

My best friend in Baltimore had twins on April 2nd. Boy and Girl. Adorable!

My former boss/friend in Maryland had twins on May 8th. Two girls. Too tiny to give an opinion.

My friend's wife is five months pregnant and at home.

My best friend's wife is due next month.

My best friend's wife in Israel had her baby two months ago.

My friend from my support group had her baby three months ago.

My cousin's wife is three months pregnant.

With all the above, I had one odd week with: a birthday, a wedding and a funeral. The cycle of life all condensed into one week of my life. The emotions run amock when that happens. You just don't know when to be happy or sad. It's all intertwined.

Then there's my job. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my job. My contractor, on the other hand? Oh, we're getting closer. Yesterday morning he came beaming to me and said, "I got that bench stained for you. I wanted you to be proud of me!" Yes, we're into that type of relationship now. I've learned a lot about how to motivate a young superintendent.

My project is about to reach a major milestone on Monday, June 9th. I'm buying breakfast. Hopefully, I'll find the time to post here a couple of photos to show everyone what I've accomplished.

My house - I'm proud to say, it's not a mess! I've made major progress on the computer room, and I think with three more weekends of intensive work, I should be able to take a good photo of it and post here the results. My living room is presentable. My kitchen is awesome. Can't complain.

This past weekend we celebrated our neighbour's 50th birthday. It was a great opportunity for my husband and I to get aqcuainted with the Party Store. Our neighbour returned from the party, to a bunch of blown up flamingoes up in trees, and inside her mailbox, plus a few balloons, and some other old people's decorations. I think her laughter woke up the entire neighbourhood. Her flamingo looks a bit anemic now. But still very much pink.

I honestly don't know where time flies, but I'm beginning to think that American Idol stole quite a few hours of my week lately. I'm rapidly gaining them back. So I may be able to write more on my blog. That's if my husband ever does something to the insulation in the attic, because right now I'm sweating from the heat in the computer room.

An International Conference

2008-05-15T14:45:00.004-04:00

This past week I've been home alone. My husband was out of town last week and three weeks ago. This week he wasn't out of town, but he was definitely not home. He had an international conference to host in DC. Back in November (Thanksgiving) he attended a similar conference in Australia. This time they came here.

The international conference included delegates from US, Australia, Canada, UK and New Zealand.

Every single night this week they've invited him out for Happy Hour or dinner, and he'd come stumbling back home after 10pm.

He's out at Happy Hour today, as well.

As I enjoy my time alone, I've been surfing the blogs and trying to catch up with old posts, when I came across Colonel's post from this past weekend.

Since this post had several very funny jokes, I'll post the one I liked:

Last week we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange.

When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.

When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?"

"Well,"he explained, "the restaurant's owners hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift."

As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it with his spare and said, "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now."

I was impressed. Then I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?"
"Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of you-know-what, we can pull "it" out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39 percent."

I asked, "After you get "it" out, how do you put "it" back?"

"Well," he explained, "I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon."

I liked this so much that I decided to email it to my husband, knowing that he checks his crackberry every two minutes, and told him it's a good joke to share with his international friends at Happy Hour.

Half hour later, this is the response I got back from him:

They loved it. Had to explain that fly was a zip. Also had to translate that Australians do not know how to use a spoon, the UK does not know what a spoon is, and that the Canadians have outlawed spoons in the current healthcare system as drug paraphenelia.

Edit: My husband just got back home and asked me if I understood his response. I told him I don't understand why an English joke requires translation to English. He said, "we're five nations separated by a common language!"

Hurricane in DC

2008-05-09T17:50:00.000-04:00

This has been an exciting week for me at work. Some of you may assume that any time a fictional hurricane hits DC must be very exciting, but actually that wasn't the reason why I had more fun than anyone should be allowed to have.

Last week we were told to be prepared to participate in a government wide exercise. We were told that an email will be sent out and if we don't respond within two hours, we will receive a phone call. I'm not sure whether I was just too busy to pay attention to the dates, or whether they decided to start it sooner, but I was taken by surprise when my employer called my house at 9pm on Monday.

I don't get phone calls from anyone that late, and most definitely not from my employer. So the first natural thought that ran into my mind was, "I still haven't finished my two projects, I'm about to be fired!" A couple of days later when I exchanged thoughts with a coworker who got the same call a few minutes after me, I found out that HIS initial thought was "oh, that's nice, she's calling to chat." Men!

When I answered the phone and she said, "this is a level 3 emergency," I stupidly answered, "what do you want me to do about it?" Thankfully, it didn't come out in those exact words, but I was definitely thinking that.

The following day was frantic all over. Upper management was attending emergency meetings throughout the day, and everyone was scrambling about doing everything possible to help them out by preparing different lists, presentations, etc. I did my share and helped when I could. The atmosphere was definitely intense for everyone.

Hey waitaminute, did I mention my contractor from hell? You all must be thinking, "ummm....yeah, but he was supposed to be done!" Well, he's not. Not only that, but since my post, he's hit the Gas Main (forgot to call Miss Utility), and revealed that they may not be done with my project by April 21st. (DUH! It's freaking May 2nd, I could figure it out by looking at my calendar and watching your construction trucks outside).

Ok, back to my hurricane level 2 (yes, we've progressed since the phone call on Monday. Hurricanes don't wait for anyone). So what comes into my inbox at 2:30pm, as my office and everyone is in a state of "emergency"?

Dear Project Manager,
We were just notified by the command center that we've lost power to the surveillance video camera on your building. The one that points to the guard gate. We launched an immediate investigation team and discovered that the power cable was cut off inside your building. WTF???
Sincerely,
Security

Honestly, they didn't add that word at the end, but the question marks were there.

I swear I was ready to jump out the window at this point. Like I needed one more stressor on top of everything else going on. So my first reaction was to notify my immediate management of the emergency. Of all the days that this could have happened, this was SO NOT the right time!!! How do you throw in a wrench in the middle of an exercise that constitutes a REAL emergency? My boss got into panic mode and immediately emailed upper management, who by the way, were already on the road escaping the "Hurricane." I told him he should have emailed them saying, "Hurricane blew off the surveillance camera off the guard gate." He didn't find this amusing. Mostly because someone ELSE was selected to throw in the wrench into the exercise, and he would have been crucified for taking this guy's role mid-exercise. I can't imagine how everyone would react in a real situation...

After I've had some time to rehash what happened, I realised that somewhere out there, sitting across the security cameras, mid-exercise, there's a guard who noticed the screen go blank, and I'm sure he must have assumed that this was part of the exercise. I can only imagine the look on his face when he realised this is for real!

On the third day of the much anticipated hurricane, all of upper management was gone. Just my coworker (federal) was left behind to run the place. He explained to me that the guy who throws the wrench into this exercise calls people throughout and kills them off ("you've just been killed in a car accident."..."hurricane just flooded your office and you have no computer or phone to communicate."). Well my coworker was eager to get killed so he can stop playing exercise and can get some work done. Every few hours, I'd shout over my cubicle, "Hey, you still alive???" He'd answer, "yes" and I'd respond with "I'm sorry to hear that!"

I love my job!

It was a beautiful sunny week through Wed. The hurricane exercise ended yesterday afternoon. And THAT's when the heavy rains began! The government has to improve on timing.

Overall grade: C- needs improvement.

TMI

2008-04-26T21:36:00.003-04:00

[Note to my sister-in-law: Probably not the post you should read. Skip this one.]

My husband and I went to dinner this evening and as we drove back I saw this lady standing on the curb. I made a comment to my husband about her physique when I noticed she just climbed into the passenger seat of a car. That's when I put one and one together and looked in amazement at my husband.

Mybrid: "That was a hooker!"
Ybrid: "Yup."
Mybrid: "I've never seen one in action getting into a car!"
Ybrid: "Yup."
Mybrid: "Have you ever slept with a hooker?"
Ybrid: "Nope."
Mybrid: "Sluts?"
Ybrid: "Yup."
Mybrid: "Was I one of them?"
Ybrid: "Nope."

Slight pause.

Mybrid: "What are you going to teach our kids - hookers or sluts?"
Ybrid: "Depends on the economy."
Mybrid: "Huh???"
Ybrid: "In a recession - definitely, sluts! Why pay if you can get it for free."

Mybrid: "I can't believe we're having this conversation."
Ybrid: "About the economy?"

Lessons Learned from Passover

2008-04-21T17:23:00.003-04:00

I do have a lot of reasons why I don't post as often on my blog. Last week's reason was trying to clean the house and prepare the Passover meal while my husband as out of town in California for a week.

Anyway, just thought I'd post a Lessons Learned.

Never hold a Matzah in one hand and a wood sample in another.

A few enteries from my professional diary

2008-03-27T17:25:00.003-04:00

Sept. 4: I started working for a new company. I LOVE my new employer!
Sept. 9: I've been given two projects to manage. I'm very excited. I LOVE my coworkers!
Sept. 15: I'm managing the construction of two dining facilities. Sweet! I LOVE my projects!
Sept. 22: I'm the project manager. Someone else is the construction manager. I cannot be blamed for anything. Awesome! I LOVE my position!

Oct. 15: I've been asking the contractor to provide me a schedule for two weeks now. I LOVE the commute!

Nov. 6: They found severe termite damage in my building. Structural Engineer's report says, "Building is supported on the stucco and siding. Do not proceed to work until proper support is put in place."
Nov. 14: Still no schedule. Contractor claims the project will be done by Dec. 14. Construction Manager sends a threat letter to the contractor - deliver or be fired. I LOVE my construction manager!
Nov. 30: I asked the contractor when he will complete the project. He said "Dec. 14", so I asked "and when do you plan to increase the number of construction workers on site. Like from one person to possibly two." I got the look.

Dec. 4: Woooohooo! I got the schedules! Bad news - one project's deadline is April 15th, and the other is July 21st. I announced to the world "unacceptable!" I LOVE my role in life!
Dec. 10: Contractor decided to core drill through the slab without x-raying first. Abandoned conduits were the victims. Core drill is performed with a diamond drillbit and water to cool it down. Water travels in conduits. Abandoned conduits typically end wherever the previous tenant cut them. Water finds three cubicles, two computers, one cellphone, tons of paperwork. My second floor tenant is not happy. But since my client trumps them by a few ranks, they don't file a complaint. I feel lucky. But I update my resume just in case.
Dec. 20: Plumber contractor comes across asbestos. Building is closed down until they perform asbestos abatement.
Dec. 28: I asked for a status on the schedule. Wanted to know where we stand with the recent developments and the requirements to crash the schedule.

Jan. 10: Freaking contractor calls in OSHA due to more asbestos. OSHA comes and tickets them for safety violation. Area is declared hard hat construction site. I LOVE OSHA!
Jan. 20: Still no schedule.
Jan. 21: Lead paint found in the bathrooms. Enough to make toys for the local Toys R Us store.
Jan. 28: I finally decided which trusses and which rafters will be painted and stained. I sent seven pages of a visual display of what should be the final result. I paid my sister-in-law to do her magic in Photoshop (she's a graphic designer). I LOVE my sister-in-law!

Feb. 1: Construction Manager told me one project will be completed March 1, and the other will be completed April 21.
Feb. 2: I told my client that one project will be completed March 31 and the other will be completed May 23.
Feb. 4: Plumbers found more asbestos in my building. I HATE these plumbers!
Feb. 10: I told the contractor that the two bathrooms each get two windows - one on each exterior wall.
Feb. 13: Painter started painting the rafters. Despite my seven page visual he painted the historical trusses which were supposed to remain dark. I started climbing on the scaffolding to slap him silly. Superintendent stopped me. I gave him the look.
Feb. 15: Future chef wants a take-out window between the kitchen and the waiter station. I LOVE my future chef. He's cool!
Feb. 20: We met with the structural engineer, architect, construction managers, contractors, and all of gods children. Future take-out window must be very carefully coordinated due to a diagonal structural beam running through the wall.
Feb. 21: I took some photos of future location of take-out window, put them in power point, pointed out where structural joist is, what height to put the window. I LOVE taking photos!

Mar. 3: I told the contractor that those new studs in front of the future windows in the bathrooms must go. I'm surrounded by morons.
Mar 5: My construction manager breaks the news that the contractor will not be done on Mar 1, and has been given a drop-dead date of Mar 14.
Mar 7: I move my office location to the job site in anticipation of performing the punch list walkthrough. Soon. I can't stand this cold weather out here. Only one more week to go!
Mar 14: I wear black for the funeral. Contractor hasn't dropped dead, but I'm about to kill him.
Mar 15: Construction Manager forgets to mention that the drop-dead date has been extended to Mar 21. I'm hoping he'll drop dead soon.
Mar 20: Spring is here. Bird entered the kitchen. I sent a ticket to get it removed. Security emailed back "which type of shotgun should we use?" Future chef emails me "how would you like your wild game cooked?"
Mar 24: Contractor covered future windows in the bathrooms with drywall. HELLO? Anybody in there??? Remove them NOW!

Mar 25: Contractor decided to try out a switch. It was the fire alarm. The entire building was vacated. Some really important people were inconvenienced for 45 minutes. Important people weren't very happy. They don't love me any more.
Mar 27: Contractor installs tiles over future windows. Ok, I swear to dog, if I have to tell this moron one more time that there are WINDOWS going in there, I'm going to freaking bring a knife and cut the windows out myself!
Mar 27: I walk the site with future chef. Future chef looks at take-out window installation and exclaims, "Wasn't that a structural joist?" I look over, and sure enough, freaking contractor has cut the structural joist straight through! I count to ten and call the superintendent over, "Sup, did you consult a structural engineer before cutting this beam?" He responded with, "No, but don't worry, I'll just put a couple of 2x4's right above, and it'll be fine." I took a deep breath and called Construction Manager. Told him, "I LOVE my job! I LOVE my job! I LOOOOVE my job!" Construction Manager said, "Oh cr@p, I'll be right over!"

Mar 28: That's tomorrow. I have to wake up early. I need to spend a couple of hours writing up a list of things that need to happen before I'll be willing to walk the site and perform a punch list. Like, I want the kitchen equipment installed. I want running water. I want the wall base down. I want the chair rail. I want the bathroom stalls. I want the wall paint done. You know, little things like that.
Mar 31: I need to bring a knife to work. Must commit harakiri. Promised my client project would be done. I already know it won't.

I LOVE my job!
I HATE my contractor!
I LOVE my employer!
I HATE the plumbers!

Another Before and After

2008-03-09T17:36:00.000-04:00

I just realised that I never updated you on the final product of our light fixture improvement project.

So here it is, the final product photos. I hope you'll all agree that this is a huge improvement on the funky light fixture that was there originally.

Some of you may notice that the photo angle is very limiting and not giving you the full picture. I blame these walls that are in the way:

This problem will be resolved tomorrow as a new contractor enters our house to perform some demolition. Yup, these walls need to come down. I need more open space, dammit.

And when it's all done, I'll be able to take better photos of the kitchen. Of course that's the only reason we're demolishing the walls - so I can upload better photos on my blog.

Everyone, please keep your fingers crossed that this contractor will be a tremendous improvement on the last moron that did our kitchen.

Personal post

2008-03-03T21:15:00.001-05:00

To my fellow sophisticated, cultured, intelligent, good-humored, charming Aquarian from Compuserve - please email me. Your email address was lost in the big PC breakdown.
email.mybrid@gmail.com

Save your photos! NOW!

2008-02-27T16:20:00.001-05:00

My PC is in the shop. Still. After erasing my hard drive, doing a restore and returning it back to us, we found it's still not working right. We returned the PC back to Best Buy, told them it's been through rehab and now needs to be hospitalized at the lab.

But I wasn't too worried, because I had used my new Black Friday purchase six weeks ago to backup all my emails and a few of the files in My Documents. Plus, I had most of my folders backed up on my Maxtor external hard drive (80gb) about a year ago.

The biggest possible loss would have been two critical files - my financial spreadsheet which I had just completed for 2007 so we can do our taxes, and my password spreadsheet which is where I track every single website's user name and password, registration numbers for appliances, and all other important information.

Good news first - financial spreadsheet - for some unknown reason I've decided to email it to myself, JUST IN CASE.

Password sheet - I have the last version of it on my laptop and only lost three months worth of registrations. Sucks, because I just registered our kitchen appliances and got warranties for them.

Photos.

Yeah, millions of photos. From 1999 through this year. Okay, where was I supposed to have them again? Oh, Maxtor. No problem, let's connect the Maxtor to my laptop and get it all saved into my other Black Friday purchase (MyBook 500 GB).

About that...

Maxtor (80GB) is dead. Kaput. No longer working. Worked fine two months ago. Now is dead.

Do I have another backup of photos? Sure, I have CD's that I made a couple of years ago. But this still means I've lost a tremendous amount of photos.

Thankfully, I married a computer geek. He took an old PC apart, broke the Maxtor to its components. Reconnected the Maxtor with new cables. Connected my new WD Black Friday purchase to the US drive, and we began the process of saving everything from the broken Maxtor to the new WD.

48 freaking hours later, it finally finished backing up 80GB worth of files. (Did I mention it was an old PC we used?).

Now, I have two external hard drives hooked to my laptop - WD (160gb) and MyBook (500gb), as I transfer everything to MyBook.

I still don't know the extent of my loss. I've uploaded a lot of photos to the website, so I do have a means to bring back most of my stuff. But that's going to take a considerable amount of time to do.

What I do know - next time I make a purchase on Black Friday, it's going to come out of the box the following day, and used within a week. No more procrastination.

Lessons learned - save your photos NOW. Use CD's. Don't trust those external hard drives.

I'm not taking a break

2008-02-15T18:52:00.000-05:00

I was forced to take a break.

You all remember my room with all the papers scattered around?

Three weekends ago we went to IKEA and bought two filing cabinets for all those papers. But here's the problem with IKEA - you go in for one thing, and you end up with something different. We ended up with a major plan of reorganizing the house furniture.

Two cabinets from the computer room had to be moved, computer table had to be moved, filing cabinets needed to be assembled, papers filed, etc.

Did you all catch the part about "computer table had to be moved"?

Yeah, it weighs a ton. So computer needed to be dehooked and rehooked in the new location. But in my zealousness for cleaning two weekends ago, and in my husband's eagerness to show me all the dust everywhere, he pointed to the dusty cover on my PC. Then he decided he needed to check how much dust is INSIDE the PC.

Needless to say, it was dusty. Very.

And what do you know, I had a can of compressed air used to clean keyboards, so why not use it?! Like Adam and Eve, I gave him the apple. He ate it. Computer innards were spotlessly clean when he was done with that can.

Then it was time to reconnnect the cables and boot the PC.

Yeah, you guessed it, $189 and two weekends later I still have no PC and Best Buy is making a study case of my PC. All their diagnostics indicate hard drive is perfectly fine. Problem is you can't reboot the darn thing!

Mind you, this is the PC I got a year ago because the previous one passed away while still on warranty. I paid $199 for this PC. Actually, no, I paid nothing for it. I paid $199 for a 2-year warranty. Which is wonderful, except that...ok, ask me when was the last time I backed up the information on that PC [not recently], and ask me how much it costs for a lab to backup your hard drive [$500].

Oh forget it, don't ask. I'm depressed as is.

Didn't get anything for my birthday. Yes, you all read that right. I got NOTHING. I did get a ton of phone calls and wishes from people I haven't heard from in a long time, and that definitely made me happy. Plus everyone's posts on my blog! That was awesome. You guys rock. But I got no presents. Did I mention I'm married? Yeah, he didn't forget my birthday, he just didn't get me anything for it.

I was almost ready to get the divorce papers signed on Valentine's Day. But 12 roses did magically appear on the dining room table behind my laptop.

I apologise for the lack of drawing on this post. My father's drawings are in another email account and once I log on to that account it logs me off blogger. Which sucks and aggravates the hell out of me. That's also the reason I often opt not to blog. It's just too much effort to log on to a different account just to blog. I wish they made it a bit simpler where it wasn't linked to an email account.

Done ranting. For now.

Sunset of my 30's

2008-02-05T05:20:00.000-05:00

Last birthday of my 30's! Today is going to be a fantastic day. While everyone else calls it Super Tuesday or Fat Tuesday, or Mardi Gras - I'm celebrating 39 years of breathing air. As a special treat for someone born in 69, I get 69 farenheit outside in the weather forecast! This has got to be the warmest birthday I've ever had on the northern hemisphere (I have to state that because two years ago I spent a warmer birthday in the southern hemisphere).

Last decade I wasn't as thrilled about finishing my 20's. But I'm very excited about reaching 40 next year. It'll give me reason to tell people to stop calling me "sweety" or pat me on the head as if I was a teenager.

In celebration of my birthday my PC cr@pped out on me. It's in the shop now (thank dog for warranties!).

I better get some work done. Apparently, they don't give a day off for birthday.

Sucks!

I feel SO much better now!

2008-01-31T17:45:00.000-05:00

Some of you may remember my post about my little incidence of inconveniencing a few DC fire fighters.

Well, after reading about the internet breakdown in Asia, North Africa and the Middle East yesterday, I must say that I feel SO much better now!

Here's this guy on a boat, throws out the anchor as he's done probably hundreds of times in his lifetime, when all of a sudden two continents go dark. Can you imagine how this guy feels now?

Yeah, I'm feeling good about myself right now.

New Year Resolutions

2008-01-26T19:12:00.000-05:00

Blogger finally has a Hebrew version of blogging. Yay. I can now start my Hebrew blog. Oh wait, that means I will only have an audience of 6 million people instead of several billions. Hmmmm....tough choice there.

As you all probably gathered, my new year resolutions for 2007 slipped a little into 2008. But I couldn't anticipate this horrendous housing market, so give me a break! I did accomplish every single item on my new year resolutions for 2007 and I'm very proud of my accomplishments. Now we're into 2008 and I have only one new year resolution. It's one that I will not be sharing on my blog. But I promise to share it in 2009.

Yesterday my husband and I decided to try out a restaurant that someone recommended. Since we never really celebrated the sale of our house properly (and separate from our anniversary), we decided this would count. So off we went to have dinner. $3,400 later we were stuffed!

Yes it is a bit of a pricey restaurant, but if you ever get a chance to visit any of these restaurants in the US - DO IT! It's called Texas De Brazil. The experience and the food is absolutely outstanding! Okay, don't worry, it won't cost you anywhere near how much it cost us. But this restaurant is conveniently located attached to a shopping mall, and we really needed a new refrigerator and a matching oven. That completes our kitchen remodeling project. (well, except three drawer faces that our freaking contractor has yet to deliver, and if I see the asshole ever again, I swear I'm going to slap him silly!).

Back to the restaurant - this is a place where you start off with a salad bar with the most delicious dishes you've ever tried. 100% of the dishes are unique and different. Then, you have this little coaster - one side is red, the other is green. Turn it green side up - and young cute waiters will come storming with long skewers of meat to your table. Each waiter with a different type meat. They load your plate up until you turn that coaster to red. You eat, you decide to try something new, you turn the coaster back to green. The food is absolutely fantastic! The service is outstanding. The atmosphere is phenomenal. The architecture is beautiful. The music is awesome. The professionalism and cleanliness of the place is commendable. We plan on going back to celebrate every birthday and anniversary.

As for the refrigerator and oven - honestly, they weren't as expensive as it seems, but once you add on to it delivery and the five year warranty plans on each, it all adds up. But we're going to recover some of the money by selling our old appliances on craigslist. I have two potential buyers, so I'm hoping they'll decide to take it off our hands tomorrow.

Oh, and the dishwasher we purchased last weekend - awesome. It's so quite that we can watch TV while it's running and not be annoyed.

We now have a fully stainless steel kitchen. I hate it, but since my husband will be doing all the cooking anyway, I'll deal with it. Why do I hate it? Because stainless steel shows every single finger print, and it's impossible to clean or prevent it. Not to mention I get static shocks from everything made of steel. I suppose I need to go on a diet anyway, so I won't be touching those appliances any time during the dry winter months.

The Reason We Moved

2008-01-13T17:30:00.000-05:00

Above is a photo giving you all Reason # 1 why I wanted to move out of the townhouse. This was my computer room. The place where I spent most of my time in the house. The stress factor related with coming to this mess every day was weighing on me to a degree of insanity.
There've been numerous times where I snapped at my husband just because I could no longer tolerate to look at this.

I know some of you cannot even begin to imagine how a normal person can let their house get to this condition, but in 11 years we managed to let it go this bad.

This stressor in my life was unbearable until I finally came to the realization that the main reason this room is like this is because I have no time to clean it. Of course, who has time when you're wasting three hours of your day commuting back and forth to work, then you're spending another hour trying to calm down from the commute. By the time we got to the weekend, we had no energy to take care of our house.

The solution was to move closer to work.

Well, that was a year ago. Some of you may be curious as to what my computer room looks like right now. Well, here ya go...

Ok, ok, yes, I get it. This makes no sense to you. But seriously, this is fantastic accomplishment. You see, all these papers on the floor are actually piled by topic. These are only three years worth of bills. The other 8 years are in the boxes you see on the right. Tomorrow I'll have only one more year's worth of bills to lay out on the floor: 2007.

Then...

Hmmm...then?

Oh yeah, then I get online and ask you guys - ok, my legal all knowing friends, for how long do you keep your bills?

Keep in mind, I had tremendous difficulties throwing away the ADT (house alarm) bills for the townhouse - so be gentle with your advice.

One major problem I'm already seeing is the Cingular bills. Those mf bills are about 20 pages long each! It's almost as long as the script to my phone conversations per month. They take so much space, it's just a crime against the environment.

Another issue I'm seeing - Blue Cross Blue Shield has GOT to learn to stop sending a piece of paper for EVERY SINGLE medical charge. They need to consolidate the charges per month and send me ONE statement per month instead of the 70 pieces of paper I have from this past year.

Before you admonish me for saving bills for so many years, I'll have you know that the Class Action lawsuit against VISA/MasterCard and AMEX go all the way back to 1996. And unlike most normal people who will get $25 out of this lawsuit, I intend on submitting every single bill I have from my once-twice a year trips overseas. I've been upset about those exchange rate finance charges for YEARS and kept those bills just in case someone ever has the brains to file a lawsuit. I can't wait to find out how much this lawsuit will get me.
Last time I participated in a class action lawsuit I got $500 from Toshiba. That bought my first digital camera back in 1999.

I love lawyers!

By the way, this entire cleaning effort on the floor of my computer room is because I started looking for all those credit card bills. I figured while I was doing it, I might as well pile everything else appropriately.

But NOW what?

You Don't Mess with the Zohan

2008-01-12T18:05:00.000-05:00

Note to self: Must see this movie!

Favourite quote from the trailer:
"I love my country. But the fighting - when does it end???"
"They've been fighting for 2000 years. It can't be much longer..."

Another dream

2008-01-11T02:00:00.000-05:00

Last night's dream involved a unicorn shrimp.

Should I be concerned?

Home #*&@ Home and 1993

2008-01-09T16:50:00.000-05:00

On Feb. 10th, 2007 we moved from our home of 11 years to a new home. We put the house on the market on March 2007.

We went straight into the housing market from hell.

The house has been on the market since then.

In November, my husband was sent to Australia for one week during Thanksgiving. The day before Thanksgiving we received an offer on the house.

The offer was horrendous. I had to wake up my husband and consult him on how to deal with it before Thanksgiving. We counter-offered. Day after Thanksgiving it was accepted.

Then we started a long ordeal from hell that drained the life out of our marriage, our lives, our beings. The reason I hadn't been blogging much was because I didn't want to jinx anything or take my anger out at the world only to find that this guy is handicapped or something.

So here's the short story of it:
The guy's original offer was $19K less than our price, plus he asked us to pay his closing fees - $22K.
We said, "sure, why don't we even throw in an extra $50K because we don't know you and we love your negotiation skills."
Our agent worked tirelessly to get a good counter-offer approved by the buyer.
Buyer says "ok. Settlement date is 12/27/2007."
My husband and I sadly agree, though we understood it meant no Christmas presents for any of my family-in-law.
House inspection goes by okay (well, we had to pay $700 for two trademen to fix something as silly as the heater and the sprinklers, but oh well).
Then we get a call on Christmas Eve - "we have a problem. The buyer's lender found out that the guy just purchased a car with $800/month payments and they need to reprocess his paperwork to get the loan approved. Settlement won't occur on 12/27/07. Possibly a day later."

[Fucker! Who buys a new car the week before freaking settling on a house?!!! Your freaking credit is already so low that the lender is demanding 6.75% interest rate and 1 point on your loan, because she's been working with you for several months to get your credit rating up, and because she believes she deserves the profit from this sale, and then you go buy a BMW???]

A bunch of frantic phone calls later and we decide that we have no guarantee that this asshole's loan will be approved even before the new year! "Tell him that after Monday 12/31 - deal is off."
From Christmas Eve till today we've been living from one day to the next, with ten phone calls to our agent, signing addenda upon addenda, faxing and scanning documents back and forth before noon "so we can close tomorrow" (rolling eyes), only to find that the loan has not been approved yet, or conditionally approved, or whatever other status the lender decided to whip out of her ass.
Then the buyer's grandma was brought in as a co-signer.

Closing was finally set for today. At a huge cost to my health. I have been in serious stomach pains since Saturday, unable to eat. Then to supplement this stressful period - I caught another cold. My sixth one since August. Suicide is not out of the question.

This weekend we decided to clean our house from anything we left in good faith for the new buyer (you know, things like two lamps, extra toilet paper, seven packages of wood floor, three packages of floor tiles, light bulbs). In a childish moment, I programmed the address back home on my GPS to announce the arrival to...
[I wish I had a video with sound of this computerized voice pronouncing this...]

Before closing today, we demanded not to be in the same room with the buyer. We couldn't bear to see him or his grandma after the ordeal they had us go through. We came half hour early to sign the paperwork and left.

Our agent stayed behind to get the check after the buyer's signed the settlement. The poor guy had to deal with another last minute development during closing, when the bank announced that the loan has not been processed and it will take two more days, so they cannot give us a check yet. For forty minutes he walked around the building thinking how to break the news to us, before the bank called back to say "screw it, you already signed the closing documents."

Our agent planned on dropping by at the restaurant where we planned to have dinner so he can drop off the check and have a drink with us.

Because you see, today isn't just another day.

1993 is all my husband has to remember.

Then he puts the periods in the right place - 1.9.93 - and there you have it - today is our FIFTEENTH ANNIVERSARY!

We went to our favourite restaurant, where my husband had a surprise for me. When our agent joined us, he had the waitress bring it out. [Click to enlarge]

The bottle of wine is from our agent. We had an amusing exchange between him and us today. First we gave him a bottle of wine, then it turned out he had one. Then he came to the restaurant to give us a check, then we gave him a check in return because he put in money from his commission to compensate us for the delay in closing (which we didn't think he should have been penalized for), then when we got the check for dinner, the waitress revealed that he had picked up our check before he left to ...

celebrate his birthday!

A fantastic ending to a ten month ordeal. Our house is sold!

GOOBYE, ANNAPOLIS!

Things in common

2008-01-05T12:40:00.000-05:00

I know this drawing was uploaded before, but this time it's relevant to the post.

Chickie's post about the possum reminded me of something I haven't revealed yet on this blog.

When I first met my husband we searched for things we had in common. We didn't have a difficult time finding those because some were rather obvious - like we both have blue eyes. And we both have identical hand-writing (which often freaks people out, because it's not a very common hand-writing).

As the years go by, and we shared stories from our lives before we got married, we stumbled upon one of those "matches made in heaven" coincidences.

Apparently, we both had pet Guinea Pigs. Ok, no shocker there. But how many married couples do you know where they both played an integral part in killing those guinea pigs, Huh?!?
Mine lasted a couple of weeks in a cage, before I decided to let it out and play with it. Well, I brought him to my favourite room in the house - the kitchen. The visit to the kitchen took a couple of minutes, before little guy decided to take a stroll into one of the crevices between the cabinet and the oven. So here's me thinking food will lure him out, or calling out to Ziso to come out and play with me. Ziso never came out. He got stuck. Forever.

My husband's story is a bit more exciting. He played with his guinea pig at the top of his bunk bed, when his mother called him for dinner. Well, him being a very energetic kid, took the guinea pig in his hand and jumped down from his bunk bed. You're all thinking now - ok, what's the big deal? Well, what you're missing is that when excited kids jump off the bunk bed, they have a tendency to squeeze their hands tight. So tight that it suffocates little guinea pig that was alive only a second before.

Ok, no need to comment - I know, I know, we're both going to hell.

Happy New Year!

2007-12-27T17:15:00.000-05:00

I have ten new drawings from my dad, and now I'm seriously behind on my blog. I feel like such a disappointment to all my 4.5 readers. Wish I could make it up to you guys. I'm not even good at responding to comments. But be assured - first thing I do when I get home from work is check out the comments on my blog. It always makes me smile to get them. And then I immediately cringe and feel awful for never leaving comments on everyone else's blogs.

Thing is, I do check everyone's blogs and would have loved to comment on all of them, but because this blog is under one account, and my regular gmail is under a different account, I can't seem to keep two windows open with different accounts, and it sucks! That's also the reason I don't post as much. I prefer to have my regular gmail account on the screen all evening, and in order to blog I have to log out and login to a different account.

Confused? Bored?

Yeah, I know how you feel.

So the concert we went to was absolutely FANTASTIC! I would LOVE to see it again. It was well worth everything (particularly going to bed at midnight and waking up at 5am for work the following day).

I've been taking a lot of photos, saving links, sending emails to myself with the intention of posting them on this blog. Somehow it never happens. Of course, it'd make sense if I emailed the CORRECT account when I try to remind myself what to post. But apparently, I'm not that smart when I'm at work.

I think work is draining my last brain cells.

But I was thrilled to find out that I'm not the only victim of this phenomena.

I invited a coworkers to join my family-in-law's celebration of Christmas. He did drop by but didn't stay because his daughter wasn't feeling well. Today I saw him and decided to grab a quick lunch with him. We sat and talked for 20 minutes about Israel, being Jewish etc. As I walked him to the elevator, he was silent for a few seconds and then turned and asked, "is your husband Jewish?" I just busted out laughing, "Ummm...I just invited you for Christmas at my mother-in-law's remember?"

I think it's the building where I work. I'm sure there's this sick building syndrome in this old structure.

Speaking of which...I have to tell you why the city of D.C. would be much safer if they banned me from ever entering it. As you all already know I work for the client who must not be named. So no search engine ever finds this blog.

Well one day as I stayed late at work, a coworker who left only 15 minutes earlier, called me from his cellphone. Now, this guy never calls me, so needless to say I was a bit hesitant to answer the phone. But I did. He proceeded to tell me that as he was walking out the building he smelled a very strong smell of something burning from a room on the first floor, but he couldn't open the door to check it out.

Well, with me being rather resourceful I found the little printed card left on my table by my other coworker who has had enough of me complaining that it's cold and urged me to call Building Management MYSELF if I ever have any complaints. So I took the card, read it carefully to make sure it was the appropriate call to make. And picked up the phone.

Ok, maybe I didn't read it very carefully. Maybe I just skimmed it. But I swear it had the building's name at the top, and I guarantee you it was the building I was sitting in.

The phone conversation went like this:

Guy who answered my phone (GWAMP): H0m3l@nd Security, may I help you?

Mybrid: Hi, a coworker called me and said there's a burning smell on the first floor, can you please send someone to check it because the room was locked?

GWAMP: Your name?

Mybrid: [full name given]

GWAMP: Where are you?

Mybrid: Right here.

GWAMP: Which State?

Mybrid (thinking to herself "ummm...you're kidding me???"): DC!

GWAMP: Where in DC?

Mybrid ("am I on candid camera?"): It's this building right in the center of DC.

GWAMP: Okay, let me send a dispatch over.

I hang up, thinking to myself - "what have I done???"

Not more than a minute later I hear sirens all around the building, and my coworker calls me and says, "well? did you call?" - I just about took his head off and told him those damn sirens in the background are HIS damn fault! But he didn't hear nor see anything, so he thought I was kidding him and hung up.

Two minutes later (mind you this is 6:30pm now), my phone rings:

GWAMP: "Ma'am, who do you work for?"

Mybrid: "client who must not be named."

GWAMP: "You don't work for the security force in the building, do you?"

Mybrid: "no sir, I just work here."

GWAMP: "Well, because 99.9% of the calls we get at this hour are from security personnel, and since we thought the situation was not under control by the building's security force, I dispatched the city's fire trucks."

Mybrid: "ummm...thank you (?!?!)" [gulp]

GWAMP: "You're welcome."

At this point, I put on my coat, put my hat one, put on my gloves, took the elevator to the exit door, covered my mouth and eyes with my hands, and rapidly made an exit through the fire trucks blocking my exit from the building. The nice fancy h0m3l@nd security emergency car was parked diagonally in the corner of the street, as I passed it by, doing my best to reflect the image of "you don't know me, you've never heard my name, I have nothing to do with blocking traffic in the city the day before Thanksgiving, and I don't even work here!"

I only inconvenienced 20 firemen I believe. Possibly a few more paperwork pushers who'd have to explain how they didn't process my call through the right channels. Thankfully, by the time I got out of the parking garage everyone left. All evidence of my wrong doing was out of sight. This may have never happened. Maybe I just dreamt it? One thing I know for sure, security at h0m3l@nd would be MUCH better off without me around making frivolous phone calls.

The Jew who Loves Christmas Music

2007-12-16T11:40:00.000-05:00

Mike was tagged for a Christmas meme, but he didn't tag me (for obvious reasons). I wouldn't have an answer to any of the Christmas related questions, except one: 14. What's your favourite Christmas music?

This band turned me on to Christmas music and I can listen to them non-stop during this season.

So without wasting your time, I give you Trans-Siberian Orchestra - "Christmas Canon Rock"

Yes, Jews also like Christmas music. Not only that, but they even go to Christmas music concerts. In three hours I'll be sitting comfortably in a front row at the Verizon Center in D.C. watching this awesome concert:

It's my Christmas gift to my husband who loves their music, too. I bought the tickets while he was overseas in Australia (ummm...yeah, I think I forgot to mention that on my blog). I couldn't believe that I actually got front row seats for this show! I'm so excited.

You may all remember me posting links to the synchronized Christmas lights on this house two years ago. Well, since then we've seen it on TV ads, and many other copycats have appeared on the scene. Here's one successful house from this year's crop:

What do you think, Mike, care to admit you like Christmas music after watching these?

Handle this

2007-12-09T05:26:00.000-05:00

My husband and I have a serious problem. We can't seem to agree on how to handle things before it's too late.

The result is a situation out of handle.

I present to you our bedroom closet as they were for an entire month:

My husband's solution for the situation out of handle...yes, you're looking at blue tape.

Our guests were quite amused by the colourful solution. But don't laugh, it worked!

Well now we have a new situation on hand. This one is really pulling us apart. We just can't seem to find the right pull.

The one for our new kitchen cabinets.

But right now we have one door pull we both absolutely love, but just can't afford for all the cabinets. But the more I look at it the more convinced I am that I NEED this one. I really do. There's something about being manhandled.

How much would YOU pay for this?

A Letter Across Time

2007-12-07T19:40:00.000-05:00

I've been tagged. Only found out today.

If you haven't seen these meme's before, read this one, and this one.

The Rules:

Link back to the person who tagged you. Send a letter back in time to your 13 year old self. Tag 5 more people to do this meme.

I was considering writing this letter the first time I read it on Mike's blog, but couldn't come up with anything positive to tell myself. So my apologies if this letter turns out to be the most depressing post I've ever written here.

Dear young and crazy me,

You're not going to listen to me because you know better and you don't care what adults think. But I'm going to write this anyway, in the offchance that because it's written in English you'll feel curious to read it.

I know you've just recovered from breaking up with your second boyfriend (who was the cause of your breakup with the first boyfriend), and I know you've got a crush on someone in your class - I have good news and bad news. He'll become your boyfriend. But he'll also break up with you without ever kissing you. He'll talk about it, but he'll never initiate it. Give it a month and move on! Let it go. Don't spend the next four years avoiding him, avoiding looking at him, writing sad poetry, and feeling depressed. Your health isn't worth it! You're going to end up in the hospital because of it. Let it go.

I'm afraid to break some bad news to you. In about a year you're going to experience a tragic loss in your life. Your best friend will be fataly shot by a new friend he made in the neighbourhood he just moved to. Please don't let the guilt eat you up. Yes, you know his new friend is a loser. Yes, you know his new friend is one step from being a criminal. But you did everything you could as a 14 year old. You met your best friend and straight out warned him against being friends with this kid. You told him to stay away from him. You did what you could. The loss will be tremendous because he's like a brother to you. You grew up with him. But you will find a new soul mate in the mutual friend you both had. He'll become like a brother to you and you will be a comfort to each other for life.

Your next few years in High School will not be a walk in the park for you. You're going to struggle to stay above water. You'll spend hours upon hours doing homework, having no social life. The breakup from your boyfriend will send you to the hospital. You'll lose all your best friends. Kids are evil. They're kids. Let them be. You're about to find new friends. They'll visit you at the hospital and will become your best friends for life.

While you'll be busy feeling sorry for yourself and recovering from a broken heart, there's this guy in the other class whom you've seen (because it's hard to miss a 6'8" tall guy in school) - pay attention to him. Just because he hangs around with all the criminals of the school, doesn't mean he's one of them. They like him because he's tall and is great on their basketball team. He doesn't care about them. He's looking for a girl who'd appreciate who he is. Unfortunately, you're going to completely ignore him in high school. You'll never talk to him. But one day after you graduate from high school and start studying for university entrance exams, he'll recognize you, because he's always seen you at school. You're nine days older than him. You two are soul mates, you just don't know it yet. Had you met him two years earlier, you two would have gotten married and lived happily ever after.

But life doesn't turn out the way you ever thought it would. A year after you graduate from high school you will meet an American and fall madly in love. Your Israeli soul mate whom you will meet two years later, will be your sounding board when your American boyfriend doesn't write back to you or call you. Your soul mate will be there for you every time you need a shoulder to cry on. He will never tell you he's in love with you because he will know you're in love with the American. But he'll tell your sister-in-law (yes, your brother did end up marrying that girl you just met the other day). And your sister-in-law will tell you that your soul mate is in love with you. But you, cold hearted b*tch, will ignore it, and won't acknowledge him. In fact, it will take you 18 years to admit to him that you knew this. He will end up paying for your flight ticket to surprise your American boyfriend on Christmas. That's how much he cares about you.

When you return back from that visit, sit with your soul mate and talk to him about you two. Give him a chance to tell you how he feels. Don't be so selfish.

You're going to end up marrying the American. You're going to spend seven years getting a degree and ten years developing a career. It's all a big mistake. I know you won't listen to me, and I know you'll do it all over again if you could. But believe me, you should try to have kids sooner. You shouldn't wait til you're 29 to try.

Your 30's is going to be plagued by health issues. While you're doing fine right now, listen to your doctor, she's actually smart and does know a thing or two about prevention. Take the medication. Try alternatives. Don't assume that just because you're fine now it will stay that way forever.

Oh yeah, that musical instrument you play, the organ - don't stop! Just because high school is demanding and you have no time - FIND THE TIME. Music in your life is important for relaxing. You need it. Same goes for playing Tennis. It doesn't matter that you're not the best player. You like the sport and that's all that matters. You need it for your health!

You're going to spend one extra year beyond mandatory in art classes. Go ahead and spend the rest of high school doing art. Don't give it up. You're going to lose your artistic imagination if you let the math teacher control your life. You have a talent and you have an imagination. Don't let it go.

I do have some good news for you - in spite of your disease you will be allowed to join the Navy and serve the country like you want. You're going to experience the best two years of your entire life. You will never be happier. You will go through experiences that will shape the rest of your future. You will get recognized as best soldier of the year for that base. It will be the only time in your adult life that you will have to wear a skirt for the award ceremony. You won't wear one even on your wedding! How cool is THAT?!

But probably the best news of all I can tell you - remember all those best friends you lost in high school when you got ill? Remember how popular you were before you were hospitalized? Remember how you were ignored and left alone after you came back? Remember you had only three good friends after that month? It will all change after high school. You will learn your lesson and never tell another person about your disease. You will make hundreds of friends after high school! You will have the most awesome friends a person could ever dream of having. You'll gain your popularity back. And those hundreds of friends you'll gain - will one day find out about your disease, and overnight you'll have dozens of soul mates - people who care about you and love you. Life will really get better for you after high school. I promise!

One warning for your future, and you can thank me later: You'll live with your husband and dog (oh yeah, I forgot to mention after years of begging your mom for a puppy, you'll get one after you get married and he'll be the most awesome puppy in the entire world!) - you'll live with them in a townhouse. In 2005 sell it and move closer to Washington, DC. Just trust me on this one. But seeing that you probably won't listen to me, I suppose I'll just warn you now - you'll end up buying a house at premium price, and your old townhouse will be on the market over nine months and you will end up losing over $100,000 you could have had if you sold it in 2005! Not only that, but your paths will cross the Kitchen Contractor from Hell and you will forever regret getting a recommendation for a kitchen contractor from someone who's had her bath redone.

Sieze the Day! Stay as crazy as you are. So what if you'll never touch alcohol. You'll still be the life of the party without it.

Always yours,
Me.

Umm...er...all the people who read my blog have already been tagged. Well except, "Jesus's Birthday's coming" - I really think you ought to get in touch with your younger Christian self. Maybe you'll find out you're Jewish after all.

I have an addiction problem

2007-12-02T07:46:00.000-05:00

Those of you who know me well enough, know that I only drink ONE drink. Day and night. I don't touch anything else. And yes, I do carry it with me into restaurants that do not carry this drink, since it has yet to become popular like it is back in Israel.

But my addiction to this drink means that I must carry it with me to my car, so I can drink and drive. I know, I know, it's illegal to drink and drive. But I can't help it. I told you, I'm addicted!

The problem gets worse when you realise I have another personality flaw - I'm lazy. No, lazy doesn't begin to describe me. Lethargic is probably closer in definition. So more often than not, that half finished drink in my car gets tossed to the back seat, or on the floor of the passenger seat.

I try to hide it before I give people rides, because I don't want them to find out I have a drinking problem. I shove the drinks in my trunk.

Well, recently my husband realised that I really have a serious problem. In a 12 step program he forced me to admit I have a problem. He parked the car, and took all the bottles out and took a photo.

I'm uncertain what the next step of my addiction program would entail. But I can tell you I switched to cans. They're easier to hide under the seat.

Tal's Camel

2007-11-25T05:25:00.000-05:00

This post is more serious than my usual, so be prepared for something sadder than typical.

Tal was a young lady born and raised in Haifa, my hometown. On March 5th, 2003 she was killed by a suicide bomber on a bus she was on. *

Two days before she was killed, she wrote in her diary:

People tend to disregard happiness, And I think I know why. Because, when you are happy you don’t care why, And you do not deal with it too much. But when you are sad, you think of it and analyze Why you are sad, Instead of let it be, let it go and be happy again. I’m happy with no reason and I’m proud of it.

Tal Kehrmann - March 3rd, 2003

She also drew in her diary, her favourite animal:

The words "wither" and "camel" rhyme in Hebrew. A special sticker was created saying: Tal's Smile Didn't Wither.

Her father also created a website to commemorate her life and asked people to colour Tal's Camel.

The following site has the most fantastic drawings you'll ever see of a camel:

http://www.tal-smile.com/drawtalcamele.htm

If you have kids, or you have an artistic talent - go ahead, use it!

* You can read her life's story here.

I wasn't tagged, but...

2007-11-23T15:00:00.000-05:00

Mike has been kind enough not to tag me (probably because he's given up on my blog entirely), but I thought it was kinda cute, and decided to do this one. The rules:

Go to Google Images and enter your birth date as six figures*: ddmmyy (or mmddyy if you are an illogical American). Pick any five pictures from the first page of results only. Then post them somewhere we can see!

So here goes, the digits 050269 brought the following disturbing results:

This one is self explanatory, and I won't go into too much detail, but it definitely describes me.

This is my spaceship. I was sort of shocked to find it online because I was under the impression that this was classified as Top Secret by the U.S. government, but I won't be shocked to find that someone leaked this to Google just because it's got cool colours.

When I landed here on earth, this was my first vehicle. (Yes, that birth date above is my fake identity on earth).

This is my favourite dish. The beak and feet are delicious.

This is what I breathe when I'm home. The little yellow dots in the center are my kids.

Selecting Granite for Our Kitchen

2007-11-14T18:00:00.000-05:00

Our kitchen is almost complete (a month and a half behind schedule). I've forgotten what our kitchen looks like. We've spent every weekend in the past six weeks looking for the perfect piece of granite for our kitchen. We've called stores, we visited places. We took photos. We hung them on our wall in the kitchen to get a feel.

Though it's been a difficult choice and while I stumbled upon life's true treasures, I did finally fall in love. I finally found The One.

Listen to the words... **

You wait a long time for me
oooo ooo you wait a long time yeah

** For those curious who's singing this, click here. Did you guess right?

Driving outside of DC

2007-11-07T16:55:00.000-05:00

I've been reading tips on how to keep the brain working and avoid early onset of Alzheimers, and one of the suggestions was to take a different route to work or back from work.

I work in DC, so obviously there are numerous routes I could take from one point to another. Heck, I even have several options of bridges to cross if I really want to get adventurous.

But honestly, I don't think I need to, because every single time I've taken 295 south and crossed the Wilson Bridge, I've been re-routed by orange cones/flashing signs/accidents/concrete barriers/new paint on the road/and police officers to a new unrecognized totally fresh detour home.

I am willing to bet that the rate of Alzheimers in Northern Virginia will be tremendously reduced in the next 30-40 years as a result of the Wilson Bridge construction site. Of course that's if anyone remains alive after this project has taken so many years off our lives with the stress of driving over it.

You wake up in the morning and you just never know which lane you'll end on, and where it will take you. And even if you took one route in the morning, once you get off work, you better be prepared for the commute from hell back home because some bozo contractor decided that Halloween is the perfect day to mess up on the job and screw everyone's commute home.

If you're about to take a drive to Virginia, and you haven't lived here this past week, I caution you - have your GPS ready because even the landmarks are different now. Oh, and ignore the GPS warning as you drive on the Wilson Bridge and it shouts at you: "Find the nearest road!"

And by the way, don't try to get clever on me and decide you'll just catch a taxi, 'cause the b@stards will be on strike when you need them.

I am reminded of my favourite poem of all times, the first poem that I learned in English, written by Robert Frost:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Or in my own words:

Someone made me take the road less travelled, and I'll be darned if it didn't make a difference. Indeed, a half hour longer commute worth of a difference.

Hebrew Lesson #4

2007-11-05T15:15:00.000-05:00

The man with the big ear came from the city.

I really need this!

2007-11-03T17:45:00.000-04:00

I've been in this house for 9 months, and have yet to purchase one very critical piece for my bathroom. But the realestate in my bathroom is so small that I have no space to put a standard one. I may have to revert to one of these:

Doing my part

2007-11-02T18:41:00.000-04:00

Just because my mind is blank, I figured I'd take this from Mike

1.) Name one person who made you laugh last night.

Nothing makes me laugh recently. My life's too serious.

2.) What were you doing at 8:00AM?

Laying out carpet samples by my coworker's cubicle because I wanted him to approve it.

3.) What were you doing 30 minutes ago?

Finished eating dinner. Noodles & Company. I love their macaroni and cheese.

4.) What happened to you in 2006?

I spent a month on vacation in London and Australia.
I was sent out to a new jobsite.
Managed a $5 million project.
Bought a new smartphone so I could communicate with my family during the war.
Spent countless hours glued to the internet following the war in Israel.
"Met" Mike online.
Passed the PMP exam.
Became a US Citizen.
Spent two weeks in Israel after the war.
Taught about Earned Value Management at training day.
Did not get promoted.
Called my current employer in search of a new job.
Went through surgery.

5.) What was the last thing you said out loud?

"Is that 14 inches?"

6.) How many beverages did you have today?

3 cans of Fanta.

7.) What color is your hairbrush?

Brown. I think.

8.) What was the last thing you paid for?

Dinner.

9.) Where were you last night?

Home Depot. Looking for a paintbrush.

10.) What color is your front door?

By the time I get home I'm too excited to look at the colour of my front door.

11.) Where do you keep your change?

For the past week it's in a container inside the drink holder in my car. Tomorrow I plan on cashing it in.

12.) What's the weather like today?

It's ok.

13.) What's the best ice-cream flavor?

I hate ice cream.

14.) What excites you?

A guy flirting with me.

15.) Do you want to cut your hair?

I need a haircut this weekend. Desperately.

16.) Are you over the age of 25.

Yup.

17.) Do you talk a lot?

Absolutely.

18.) Do you watch the OC?

Used to. It was my favourite show. I was sad when they decided to stop it. This must be an old questinnaire.

19.) Do you know anyone named Steven?

Yeah, the asshole working on my kitchen.

20.) Do you make up your own words?

No. I have a hard time keeping up with those in the dictionary.
But I've been known to make up my own pronounciations.

21.) Are you a jealous person?

Yes.

22.) Name a friend whose name starts with the letter "A."

Alexis.

23.) Name a friend whose name starts with the letter "K."

Kyriakos.

24.) Who's the first person on your received call list?

My husband.

25.) What does the last text message you received say?

"K. Painting."

Well, that explains #9.

26.) Do you chew on your straw?

No.

27.) Do you have curly hair?

No.

28.) Where's the next place you are going to go?

Bed.

29.) Who's the rudest person in your life?

Steven from # 19.

30.) What was the last thing you ate?

Macaroni and Cheese with parmesan crusted chicken.

31.) Will you get married in the future?

If I get divorced, sure why not.

32.) What's the best movie you've seen in the last 2 weeks?

Haven't seen movies in over a month.

33.) Is there anyone you like right now?

My employer.

34.) When was the last time you did the dishes?

Considering it's been over a month since I've had a kitchen, I will admit it's been over a month ago.

35.) Are you currently depressed?

Probably. Mike gave it to me.

36. ) Did you cry today?

Day isn't over yet.

37.) Why did you answer and post this?

I needed a distraction.

38.) Tag 5 people who would do this post.

The five people who read my blog are welcome to do what they like.

Hebrew Lesson # 3

2007-10-31T15:45:00.000-04:00

It's a beautiful tree.

Hebrew Lesson # 2

2007-10-28T09:25:00.000-04:00

Miss Par has the first number in the line.

(Read: Number in English is Mispar in Hebrew.)

From now on, I will not explain it in parentices. The word in red is the English, and the word(2) in blue are the Hebrew translation.

In no particular order

2007-10-28T09:21:00.000-04:00

Okay, it's going to be a disjointed post, maybe even a long one. But if I don't just write everything, my memory cells will explode from overload.

Ever since I started writing this blog I find myself going through life and thinking to myself, "oh, I have to write this on my blog".."oooh, this is really funny, I have to mention it on my blog".."wow, this is great. I can't wait to share this with everyone."

Then I get home, and feeling so wiped out that I cannot for the life of me recall what I wanted to share with you all.

So here are snippets from what I sort of remember, that may have either been funny or very angering.

I was ten minutes late to the pharmacy to get my flu shot. The ladies were counting the money and their lists as I came over and said, "darn, I'm late, aren't I?!" The one lady picked up her head, and said, "Yes, I'm afraid so." I then asked, "when is the next time you're holding this?" The helpful lady started saying, "Nov. 3rd we'll be back here." So I asked, "what time?" Then this other lady snapped and said, "I just left the information at the pharmacy counter, why don't you go ask them?" Would it really have hurt her schedule to think for five seconds about the answer to my question and give me the answer rather than being so rude? I was very upset because I was in pain and limping, and she just made me walk 20 additional steps that she could have prevented with just answering "12 to 6."

Conversation with my husband as we were searching for a new granite top for our kitchen:
Mybrid: "I think we should find a granite that has some orange on it, so it disguises the Fanta drops when I pour into a cup."
Ybrid: "Why don't you just learn how to pour without spilling?"
Mybrid: "Are you kidding me?! I'm not a proffesional drinker like you."
Ybrid: "No, you just have a drinking problem!"

One night before heading to bed, I couldn't find my cellphone after finishing to fold the laundry:
Mybrid to husband: "I can't seem to find my cellphone! Can you help me please?"
Ybrid: "Give me the wireless and I'll call it."
Mybrid: "But I turned my cellphone on vibrate last time I held it."
Ybrid: "Then we'll just have to be very quiet to hear it."
Mybrid: "Ok, go ahead."
[5 minutes later, and running around our room to the sound of SOMETHING vibrating, we finally found it in my sock drawer].
I got in bed all happy. Started reading a book. When the home phone rang. My husband ran to my sock drawer, opened it, and lifted a pair of socks to his ear, "HELLO? HELLO? Can you hear me now?"

After the third day of construction in our kitchen, I got back home to find an invoice for change orders:

Communication since then has evolved between us to pieces of drywall:

Hebrew Lesson # 1

2007-10-21T18:54:00.000-04:00

Ok, I'm getting really stressed about not writing much on this blog, so I'm going to start something more regular. Hebrew lessons.

Here's your first one. In red is the word in English, in blue is the translation to Hebrew.

This is a nice house, I think I'll buy it.

(read: House in English is Bayit in Hebrew)

I will still be writing in my blog, but when I'm stressed for time, it'll be a Hebrew lesson.

Kitchen Make-up

2007-10-18T18:00:00.000-04:00

I know you've all been wondering where I've disappeared to and why you haven't even seen me checking your blogs or posting comments, but here's the excuse in photos.

We used to have a kitchen.

A place to cook meals, sit at the table, eat, rest, and then when done, I'd go check email and blog.

It was a very nice kitchen. Cabinets were two years old. But we had a problem with the light fixture. It was funky, didn't belong in this modern house and didn't emit much light. Here's what it looked like:

So my husband and I have been sitting in this house for over six months, trying to figure out what we can do to improve on this light fixture.

It finally dawned on us what was really wrong with the kitchen. So this is what we did...

So yeah, we no longer have a sink, a stove, a dishwasher or a microwave.

All meals are eaten outside. I get back home, slip into comfortable clothes, and we go out to eat at a restaurant. We side-step to Home Depot to find a light switch there and a box there. We get back home at 9:30pm every day. I get enough time to read emails. That's it. Then I have a ritual of taking 50 photos of my kitchen before going to bed, take my medicine, and go night-night.

Can anyone blame me?

Another new post below.

Talking to the point

2007-10-18T17:45:00.000-04:00

This is one of those letters seeking help with a personal situation. I had to share it with my readers.

Click to enlarge.

Oil Refineries in Haifa

2007-10-07T14:40:00.000-04:00

My dad is in China so I'm out of drawings to post. I have to revert to photos.

This is a photo of my hometown - Haifa, Israel on a very hazy day in April when Khamsin visits it for fifty days. Khamsin is the sandy storms that come from Egypt with very hot and dry temperatures during the Springtime.

But I digress, as I will throughout this post.

Here's a photo of Haifa.

Circled in red are Haifa's Oil Refineries. Or what Saddam Hussein's intelligence mistook for a nuclear reactor.

Why? Because of its shape. Here's a closeup of our "nuclear reactor."

Okay, so I ask you intelligent readers - we have one Jewish state in the world. We have the third largest populated city in this Jewish state - Haifa. This is where all the braniacs go to study at the Technion (The Middle Eastern MIT). Knowing that Israelis value their lives, does it really make sense to any thinking human being that the Jews would place a nuclear reactor smack dab in the middle of one of the most populated Jewish cities in Israel?

Needless to say this was a big joke for all of us when Saddam Hussein shot a Scud Missile attempting to hit this innocent looking oil refinery. He ended up hitting a shopping mall that was in its last construction phases. The mall was promptly renamed Scud Mall and the name stuck to this day. If you visit the mall, there's a photo of the Scud Missile penetrating the roof of the mall and the tip of it sitting at rest at the bottom floor.

Digressing again to a true story about the Technion. For those who have never heard of the Technion, here's a brief description:

As Israel's oldest and premier institute of science and technology, the Technion - Israel Institute of Technology has been an active and leading participant in Israel's establishment and development. With supreme effort and unyielding dedication, deserts have bloomed, swamps have been transformed into fertile agricultural valleys, and sand has given way to silicon. Israel is now recognized as one of the world's most prominent high-tech innovators, and has been called the second Silicon Valley.

The Technion is pretty much the Middle Eastern MIT in many ways. Getting in is extremely difficult and graduating is just as difficult. I was one of those unlucky student thrown out after three semesters because I failed Calculus three semesters in a row (they had a rule you have to pass it on the third semester. The rule was changed a year after I was thrown out. Today you can pass it anytime within your four-five year degree). When I registered for Calculus in the US I was terrified about being thrown out again, only to find out that the level of Calculus they teach at the Technion is what is taught here at the Master's degree level. I passed it here with 100's on all my exams because it was just rehashing material from my high school years.

Due to a very lengthy process of being thrown out from the Technion I ended up studying four semesters there. Four semesters of Civil Engineering.

There was one famous story that went from one year of Civil Engineers to the following. There was a course in a third year of Civil Engineering where the semester project was to measure the height of the oil refineries in Haifa.

The same exact exercise was given every single semester to all students taking this course.

The culture of cheating at the Technion was definitely a well known fact among all students. I don't know if that is still true, but back then you couldn't pass courses without cheating. Cheating was mostly copying class projects and homework from previous year students.

Well, this one semester - all the students did their usual "diligent" work and submitted their measurements to the professor. Needless to say, everyone passed. Well, not everyone. There was ONE student who failed. He was the laughing stock of the semester because everyone else cheated from previous year's measurements whereas this asshole actually did the project the way he was taught in class. This was one of those students that wouldn't take a fail after his hard work, so he contested the grade. The Professor refused to speak to him saying he should realise that if everyone got the same measurement and he was the only one off - he's wrong. The student went to the higher ranking professors in the department and filed an official contest against his grade requesting to prove his paper.

When his case came to the board - he methodically showed everyone his paper and how he reached this measurement. Everyone was floored and an investigation began.

Turned out that a couple of years earlier there was a slight addition in height to the refineries due to complaints from the city of the air pollution caused by it. The student was right.

The professor was no longer allowed to give the same project in following semesters.

While I never did make it to this particular class, I'm still proud of myself for not cheating like everyone else just to pass a course. I just can't see the pride of graduating from anywhere knowing you cheated your way through.

The Lions Parade - The Explanation

2007-10-03T06:36:00.000-04:00

To answer your questions of why would the lions be there, or why not, I bring you my dad's photos (digitally enhanced to remove family members).

Or check out other photographs:

http://www.galenfrysinger.com/germany_munich_artist_lions.htm

http://www.estripes.com/article.asp?section=103&article=40434&archive=true

Memories from Munich

2007-10-01T17:47:00.000-04:00

I received this drawing from my dad last week with the explanation, "Enclosed, memories from Munich 2005. The lions are real and made on me an unforgettable impression."

My dad expects me to write back to him my opinion on each of his drawings. He respects my opinion and often tries to do what I tell him needs fixing. I'm not very good at faking flattery, and I'm often blunt with him.

So here's what I replied with: "Very interesting impression. Are the people real size? They look tiny."

My dad has a very dry sense of humour. He never tries to make anyone laugh. And he hardly laughs himself. But somehow people always end up laughing from what he says. Mostly because it's so ridiculous and outrageous that they can't believe he actually said it. Most people would think it tactless to say what he says. I grew up feeling mostly embarrassed by things he'd say that would make people laugh. I just never thought it was funny. Needless to say, his response to my email caught me off guard.

"You are right. The people were too tiny. I made them to match the height of the doors around, but comparing to lions it didn’t look right. So I raised the doors and enlarged the population a little. The lions are the same, but they have too much fat after consuming all the people, who are already out of my picture. See the corrections."

Memories from China

2007-09-30T13:30:00.000-04:00

Every so often my dad catches me off-guard with his emails. This drawing was sent with the explanation "This week's art reflects my memories from a visit to China, so called “Rock forest”."

My parents are leaving for China tomorrow. My dad has never been there. My dad has been displaying signs of Alzheimer's for several years now. These are very preliminary signs, but since his mother had it, we're all familiar with them.

Needless to say, when I read his explanation to this drawing I shook my head in sadness and thought, "he's really lost it."

But being the very critical daughter I am, I emailed him back with "dad, when did you visit China??? This looks like Mars!"

His prompt response said, "It is China, not Mars, and I will prove it to you, when I am back with 1343 shots (2G) I intend to take around."

At this point I felt a little relieved that he hasn't completely lost it, but I still had one question that bothered me, so I emailed him, "Ok, but you said in your email it was MEMORIES of your trip to China, so that's why I asked when were you there."

His answer had me laughing: "My teacher requested me to take an advantage of our long summer holiday and paint my memories from abroad. Which I did... However, our return from China is scheduled one week after the beginning of a new academic year, one day before a second lesson, which I have to attend. There will be no time for any painting involving China. So, I intend to prepare in advance my future memories from various spots in China."

Did I ever mention how my father used to teach me methods to cheat on exams in school? My father is the master of cheating. He devised the most cunning ways of cheating on exams and it would always amaze me the length he'd go to cheat even in adulthood. As a smoker he was allowed to bring a matchbox and a box of cigarettes into exams at the university. He took a small matchbox, emptied out the matches, put two matches perpendicular inside the box at both ends, placed a tiny scroll of paper around each match, then cut out a tiny window on the face of the matchbox. When he rolled the one match the scroll of paper would roll over from the one match to the other, and the tiny handwriting would show up on the cut out window to give him the next hint for the exam.

In fact, my parents met because of his cheating habits. They went to the same school together in Poland and my mom knew he cheated on all the exams. So one day she's had enough of him in high school and went to the school's principal to complain about my dad cheating on the exams. The rest is history. They lived happily ever after. Well, okay, except for the cheating. My mother never tolerated that part in his life. I took after my mother.

Yom Kippur in Israel

2007-09-16T16:20:00.000-04:00

Of all the days in the year that I think of Israel, Yom Kippur is when I miss it the most.

Many of you are familiar with these two words in the context of the Yom Kippur war. A couple of years ago I wrote about the song that makes me cry each time. The song that promised me that the Yom Kippur war was the last war for Israel, yet it's been through five more wars after it.

But Yom Kippur is not a war. It's a day. It's the holiest day for all Jews. The equivalent in importance of Christmas for the Pope. Yom Kippur is a day of atonement for all Jews. It's the one day a year when all Jews, whether secular or religious, will visit the synagogue. It's the one day a year when non-believers such as myself, want to believe...want to believe in some supreme being who will help us and give us a better year. It's the one day a year when Israel shuts down and becomes contemplative. Some of you may find it odd for me to refer to Israel as if it were one person, but on Yom Kippur that is exactly what Israel becomes. One collective being.

The ten days between Rosh Hashanna (New Year) and Yom Kippur are called the awful days (Yamim Nora'im). The days of atonement. The time when we must say we are sorry to our friends and family. On Yom Kippur we fast for 25 hours, from sundown to sundown. When I say fast I mean no food, no drink, no brushing teeth with water, no bathing in water, no work, no driving, no radio, no TV, no computers, no electricity, no talk about money, no carrying anything heavy. Only prayer is allowed. Only talking among people. Everyone dresses in white. And no leather shoes or anything made of leather is allowed to be worn that day.

If you've never been to Israel on Yom Kippur, then you would never understand what this truly means when an entire country goes completely SILENT for 25 hours. An entire country shuts down. NOTHING is open. Not even the ATM machines. It is so silent, that when you stand on top of Mt. Carmel you can hear a dog barking at the bottom of the mountain, and you can hear people talking all the way by the coastline. It's an absolutely amazing thing in a city of 260,000 people. You walk down the street and you can hear the sounds of people talking inside their apartments. There are no other noises. Not even the wind or rain, because Yom Kippur occurs before Fall begins.

During Yom Kippur, the country is completely disconnected from media for 25 hours. No Israeli station broadcasts.

And THAT is why the Arab countries started the war on Yom Kippur. Israelis had no means to communicate the start of the war on the radio or television. Everyone was fasting. Everyone was in the synagogue. Our army was taken by surprise. Most soldiers were back home with their families in the synagogue.

I've just spent an hour looking for videos I took last year when I was in Israel on Yom Kippur that show the silent streets of Haifa, and I cannot for the life of me find them. This really frustrates me because I'm extremely organized on my PC and have never had problems finding anything. It seems like I deleted them to save space. I sure hope I'll find them one day. But for now I'll have to live with the videos I took secretly at a synagogue last year. This is an Orthodox synagogue (as 99% of all synagogues in Israel are Orthodox), where women are separated from the men. This allowed me to take this video from the upstairs section looking at the men below.

Keep in mind, this video was taken on the last five minutes of Yom Kippur, after these men have not had a bite to eat or a sip to drink in over 25 hours, and after they've spent the entire day praying.

Throughout the day these men are praying fairly quiet. But on the last five minutes they get this extra superhuman energy to sing the last song out loud. It's called Avinu Malkenu - our father, our king. You will hear them sing: Avinu Malkenu, khaneinu v’aneinu, ki ein banu ma’asim [Our Father, our King, Grant us grace and answer us, For we lack in deeds];....and then the singing gets REALLY loud when they beg "osei imanu tzedaka v’khesed v’hoshi’einu.." [Give us justice and kindness, and save us.] This is my favourite part of everything to do with being Jewish. It's the only minute in a year that I doubt my own lack of belief and want so desperately to believe there is someone out there listening to our prayers and our begging for a better year.

This is the final request of the Jewish people as the day of Atonement is closed. The final request from G-d to sign us in the book of life.

And if you're at awe from hearing these men sing so loud after such a long and emotionally and physically straining day, listen to the final shofar** (see image above) sound (at 5:24 minutes into the video) as the cantor picks it up to conclude the day of atonement. Believe me, it is NOT easy to blow the shofar on any given day, let alone after such a day of fasting.

The last song they sing is Le'Shana Ha'Ba'aa Bi'Yerushalayim "Next Year in Jerusalem" - the way all Jews sign all their holy holidays in a wish to make pilgrimage to Jerusalem next holiday.

**The Shofar, a well know symbol of Rosh Hashanah, is one of the earliest instruments used in Jewish music. Usually made from a rams horn, a shofar can also be made from the horns of other animals, including those of a goat or sheep. It is the one musical instrument that has not changed in over 5,000 years.

Happy New Year & Ramadan Mubarak

2007-09-11T06:45:00.000-04:00

This is the last year out of three when the Jewish New Year falls with the beginning of Ramadan. And then it'll be another 30 years before these two holidays coincide.

I wish all my Jewish readers - Shana Tova U'mtuka! Sweet New Year.

And to all my Muslim readers - Ramadan Mubarak!

May this year bring only sweet things to everyone's lives. Sweet dreams, sweet smiles, sweet laughs, sweet food, sweet encounters, sweet kids, sweet work, sweet whatever they wish.

I would have made this post longer, if I had the time in the day to even think. I worked ten hours yesterday (no lunch break), and 12 hours today (no lunch break). I have no time to think or recover. Immediately after work I went shopping for food for dinner tomorrow for ten. Yeah, glutton for punishment. I took the day off tomorrow, but due to my commitment to work I agreed to come in to work on Rosh Hashanna (Thursday). I HATE doing that. It's my freaking holiday I should be resting at home. But no, I'm going to work. It sucks!

But for now, I'm loving work. Extremely stressful and a ton of things to do. That's what I wanted to do, so I can't complain. Of course the second check in the mail today was a big motivator. My employer actually paid for my own laptop, which I ordered online. How sweet is that?! My previous employer would have never let buy my own laptop and then reimburse me for it. I'm so glad I quit that company.

For those of you wondering about the image above of apple and honey. It's Jewish tradition to dip an apple slice in honey and wish each other a sweet new year. Every American I've introduced to this delicacy fell in love with it and went for seconds and thirds. I highly recommend you try it yourselves.

The good and bad about my new job

2007-09-09T18:00:00.000-04:00

The bad:

I'm back to a long commute through DC.
Parking in a garage in DC is an arm and a leg. Daylight robbery I tell ya.
The building is absolutely freezing, while outside it's 100 degrees.
The building's cafteria has a contract with Pepsi (I HATE Pepsi products and I miss my Fanta!)
The person whose place I'm filling in is not very helpful in handing over the correct information.
I work in a cubicle again. I miss my office.
I don't know anyone in the cubicle farm where I work and no one is going to introduce me either.
I have to walk to the printer. I miss my own private printer next to the PC.
I hate doing Design Reviews!

The good:

The bathrooms are close and rather clean.
There's a refrigerator within a few feet.
I have enough space to spread out the drawings.
All meetings take place in the same building.
The cafeteria is located in the same building. No more leaving the building just to get breakfast or lunch.
I already know a dozen people in this building from my previous employer.
I am surrounded by men. They're so much quieter than women in the workplace. They come to work, they work, and go home. Women - talk, gossip, laugh out loud, ask me personal questions, drive me crazy.
I don't owe any answers to any manager. I AM the manager.
I got my first paycheck on Friday, after working only 31 hours.

Note to self (or lessons learned from past week):

Next time you start a new job, schedule it two weeks after surgery and not five days after.
Never ever trust a surgeon who says, "Oh yeah, you can just go to any hospital to get that removed." It'd save you the four hours in the ER in future.

This time I can participate

2007-09-04T15:18:00.000-04:00

I've been avoiding participating in HNT because I have nothing to be proud of about my looks, but now that the rule has changed this week, I can finally participate. Thank you, Chickie, for mentioning it on your blog.

I present to you - the dorkiest photo of me.

And to maintain my tradition these past few months - that is indeed my dad's drawing hanging on the wall behind me.

Good news

2007-09-03T17:30:00.000-04:00

I'm running behind on everything I wanted to write before Labor Day, so this may be a very rushed post about everything.

Some of you have asked me if my camp experience was good or bad. To be honest, it's been difficult for me to determine that. It was bad to some extent and awesome to another. I had a blast with the kids. I loved what I did. I enjoyed the activities at camp. But I absolutely hated the adults that were in the leadership group. They had their own clique and it was getting to me on an emotional level. The other problem I had - physically, I wasn't doing well at camp. I had to come to terms with my diagnosis of arthritis. I've been in denial for five years. Camp confirmed that this is indeed a problem for me. For five years I've been hiding my handicapped placard because people give me the look when I park in a handicapped spot (I don't LOOK sick). But after camp, I've decided "screw them!" if they want any of my four conditions, they're welcome to it.

So now two weeks after camp, I'm done limping, but of course just long enough to go through surgery that caused me to walk like a monkey.

And what does my husband ask me as we approach the parking lot today - "would you like me to park in a handicapped spot?" For five years he's been asking me this because I'd only let him do it when there are plenty other handicapped spots and I wouldn't be taking anyone else's spot that may be more handicapped than me. Today I just asked him, "do you honestly believe I could walk the distance from where you just parked to the front entrance?" Needless to say, he got the message.

On the first day at camp once the kids started arriving, I was looking for five particular kids. Five kids whose mothers know me from a support website. I couldn't find one of them. Some misunderstanding (found him later). But for a brief time I was about to call the mother to find out which bus he got on. As I turned on my cellphone (we were told to have it shut during camp) I noticed a message for me.

The message was from my future boss.

I GOT THE CLEARANCE, THEY WANT ME RIGHT AWAY!

I called her right back and she told me someone gave in her notice and they want ME as soon as possible. I was so thrilled, but I told her I'd like vacation after camp because I knew I still needed surgery. I didn't think it'd be a problem for me to start working while injecting alcohol. But I suppose I'll find out tomorrow.

Tomorrow is my first day at work! After five very long months I finally get to work at the job I wanted.

I'm extremely excited about it. A bit wary because of my condition after surgery, but it's only two more days of this alcohol party and then I can go to the ER and get it removed. My boss knows about my surgery and is understanding.

I'm really worried about more surgeries I need this year, but I'm hoping the client would get to know me before I have to tell him I need more surgeries. Once they'll realise I'm not a slacker and work my ass off, they'll understand my situation better. I'm far more motivated to work because of my poor health, simply because it gives me a sense of normalcy in my life.

Of course with my new job my blog surfing will have to be reduced to evenings only. I don't think I'd be surfing the net at work. I already know I'm going to be extremely busy.

Thank you everyone for your supportive comments and emails through my unemployment phase in life as well as my health problems. It's a wonderful feeling to know so many people care.

My health is like a sinking ship

2007-09-01T11:51:00.000-04:00

I've tried really hard to escape writing about my health on this blog, yet somehow it creeps up more often than I'd like to. The problem is that my health has been on my mind 24/7 for the past three months and 23/7 for the past year. It's difficult to ignore something that is constantly on your mind. It's like talking to someone with something stuck between their teeth. You're dying to tell them because that's all you can see, but you're fighting the urge of what is socially acceptable or unacceptable.

I was raised by some very Polish parents. If anyone has ever met Polish parents than they know what I'm referring to by saying "very." It means, hugs are not common. Two kisses on each cheek to say hello and goodbye. Talking about anything intimate or personal is strictly forbidden. Mentioning some words of some body parts is punishable by execution. You wear shoes everywhere you go, including inside the house. You do not let your newborn run around naked in the pool. You use a knife and fork to eat Popeyes chicken. And you're always polite.

So what do I get to deal with? The one disease that deals me only words that I was taught never to say in public. The one disease that involves all the internal organs and bodily functions that should not be discussed out loud. None of my readers will truly appreciate the tremendous conflict this has caused in my life because none of you have these issues of feeling outright embarrassed at having to say some words describing intimate organs and some bodily fluids.

Here I am, sitting in front of my surgeon and trying to describe to him my symptoms and concerns without mentioning the forbidden words. This is like attempting to read War and Peace out loud without the nouns. I am seriously considering Show and Tell in future appointments. A power point presentation of some sort. Mike's recent post came at the right time. This is exactly what I need to do to talk about my health with future doctors. (As soon as I figure out the international symbol for gas).

Some of you may have jumped into this blog without knowing the history. So here's a recap. I have Crohn's Disease, Osteoporosis, Colitic Arthritis, Peritoneal Cysts and Periodic Leg Movement Disorder. I've dealt with Crohn's disease 28 years. With this disease being an autoimmune disease where the body attacks itself, I've had to deal with all the other side effects as well, which is why there's a list of more than just one disease.

[Disclaimer: If you have a weak heart when reading about medical conditions and procedures, DO NOT READ ON!!!]

I've been through 17 surgeries and procedures under full anesthesia. I've been through countless x-rays, MRI's, CT Scans, IV treatments, medications, TPN. Anything one can imagine besides chemotherapy. I've been seen by over 50 doctors in over a dozen hospitals. My case has been diagnosed as Severe (duh!).

The surgical procedure I had been through two days ago was the fifth time I'm undergoing this, but this time it's with a twist. My body produces fluids in the abdomen. These fluids cannot escape due to abdominal adhesions from all the surgeries. So they collect there until I can no longer walk because it's pressing on the nerves that connect my body to my legs. Then I go to Johns #*@&ing Hopkins and get the fluids aspirated.

This time the surgeon (a cardiovascular intervention radiologist) decided to perform alcohol sclerosis. I know this sounds rather appealing to those among you who have an appreciation for alcohol, but I don't. Not when the surgeon leaves a tube in my abdomen and tells me to insert 100cc alcohol through it twice a day for the next week.

I can deal with the tube. I can deal with injecting it with alcohol. I CAN'T deal with the horrendous pains once the alcohol is inside and pressing on all my nerves in the leg. So that's why I'm on pain medication.

I know it's only for five more days, but damn this is so wrong timing for it!!! (Will be explained in another post).

I hate this disease. I hate that it makes me think about it 24/7. I hate this self pity. I hate feeling that I'm not like everyone else. I just want to be normal, damnnit.

Ok, I'm done with this self pity party and going back to effective distraction methods. Like dinner with the Kikuyu neighbours.

I'll appreciate only comments that will make me laugh. But then again, be gentle. It only hurts when I laugh.

Catch up time

2007-08-31T18:50:00.000-04:00

I'm recovering from surgery and I'm on pain medication now. Perfect opportunity to update my blog (only because Michigan Mike requested). More about this surgery in a separate post (gotta keep up with my father's speed of drawings).

This is going to be one of the more disjointed posts because pain prevents me from thinking in a logical and straight line of thought.

I signed up for text messages from the county where I live. It sends me text messages about the weather and traffic. I thought it was a brilliant idea back when I registered and needed to know if it's going to rain heavily or not. Then I got this text message that had me laughing: "Traffic to Wilson Bridge is stopped due bridge opening for tall boat passing." I love it! Now I know when the tall boats are passing by. It's a dream come true. I no longer have to carry my camera around 24/7 expecting it to open any minute. I can just wait for the text message. Now if only I could train this messaging system to notify me of deer crossing street, ninja squirrel coming down the highway, or black bear sighting.

One evening I was laying in bed reading a book, while my husband was doing his nightly Washington Post crossword puzzle, when I had an urge to visit the bathroom. Typically, my husband is very engrossed in these puzzles and doesn't even answer me when I talk to him. Obviously, me going to the bathroom didn't require any kind of warning or talking, so I just got up and walked towards my bathroom when I noticed my husband put down his newspaper and got up to walk to the second bathroom. I looked at him in puzzlement and said, "What's this? Is it like yawning? When one person yawns the other yawns, too? Have we been married so long that we synchronize our bathroom visits, too?"

Since the weather turned much warmer than freezing, we've been keeping the back door open so the dog can go out whenever he desires. Of course that means that we get flies coming into our house on a regular basis. Sometimes it's really difficult to fall asleep with a damn fly in the bedroom. One evening when my husband was already in bed working on his puzzle, I turned off all the lights in the house and was ready to go to the bedroom when I heard my husband ask me for "Fly Swatter." So I responded back saying, "I have no idea where we packed it, just use your shoe." I think I heard my husband mutter some swear words at my response, when I entered the bedroom. I was a bit baffled by his annoyed reaction, when he anunciated it very slowly, "I asked for some I-C-E W-A-T-E-R!"

Back from Camp - Notes to Self

2007-08-23T17:10:00.000-04:00

I got back on Saturday. I hereby enclose some Lessons Learned, in case I think about doing this again.

Driving north 3.5 hours with two passengers in the car doesn't mean it'll take you that fast to drive back south. Check traffic congestion in Philadelphia before launching on a 5.5 hour drive back. Alone.

You know you catch colds easily. You were very well prepared with Coldeeze and Vitamin C, but what were you thinking when you neglected to pack the Tylenol Cold to treat the symptoms of a cold?!

When the Recommended Packing List suggested warm blankets and sweatshirts, don't ignore it, even if the temperatures have been in the 100's the week prior to camp!

15 year old girls do not sleep. Deal with it. Don't bother trying to figure out what they talk about all night long. You were 15 years old once, your mother didn't understand it either.

Adults act like adults, kids act like kids. If you prefer kids, stick to them the entire time and don't bother messing with the adults and their cliques.

That was a brilliant idea to bring to camp all the most colourful cool pants in your closet. Bring more next time. Kids love it. Gets their attention rather quick.

19 year olds are not mature enough to be counselors in a bunk filled with 15 year olds. Question authority next time.

Don't listen to picky people who claim camp food is awful. Find out if camp's chef does home deliveries.

After five exhausting days at camp, do not attempt to make your own breakfast. You look rather silly preparing the Pita bread for spreading chocolate over it, only to find out after you've stuck the knife in chocolate that you're holding the wrong end of it. You should be thankful it was a plastic knife and not a steak knife, or you wouldn't be typing this now.

These may have been 160 very sick kids, but that doesn't make you any healthier. Standing for nine hours while running an activity is not for someone sick. Get a chair. Sit on it. Kids can still hear you.

When they tell you the camp is in the hills of Pennsylvania, they really mean mountains in Israeli terms. Practicing by walking up and down a hill 15 minutes every morning for two weeks is a noble idea, but not sufficient. Next year start weight lifting and serious strength exercises two months prior to camp. Run a marathon the week prior.

Shoes bought at a boating store that are meant for water activities are not shower shoes. They do not dry within 24 hours. In fact, they do not dry in 48 hours either. Use sandals instead. Or don't shower.

When packing your clothes for camp, make sure you pack clothes that can be easily figured out without getting a brain hemorrhage early morning. May want to double-check that bra you took to camp. Something was seriously wrong in its design. Look for instructions. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you feel stumped.

Kids are cute, but you can't take them all with you home. You don't have 160 bedrooms.

Off to Camp

2007-08-11T19:07:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow early morning I leave for camp. I'll be back Saturday night. Services will resume sometime after I catch up on my sleep.

I would have written more, but I have a splitting headache from stress.

For Colonel - Let Sleeping Ducks Lie

2007-08-10T03:30:00.000-04:00

For those who follow Colonel's Blog, today's show is brought to you by the Letter X:
Click on a photo to embiggen.
And the letter Awwww:

No, they're not dead. They're only a day old! Here's the movie:

To view more photos of Mother Duck and 13 Ducklings, click here. Notice the human attraction that animals bring to a workplace? Slackers - all of them. I was just there to take pictures.

And for the Jumping Ducks movie, click on Play:

An email exchange with my father

2007-08-09T17:30:00.000-04:00

Before you read the email exchange below I think I should clarify that my parents have been married for 48 years. In my family's circle everyone knows who is my father since we're so much alike, but there is serious doubt about who is my mother. The only proof she has is that she was in the hospital that day.

Date: Aug 9, 2007 10:50 AM
Subject: Art connected with Poland (cont.)
"Mybrid,"
This is connected with a huge shopping mall in Warsaw (designed and built by Israeli contractor). In nature, the fish is not a part of it.
Love,
Dad

Date: Aug 9, 2007 1:13 PM
Subject: Re: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

Dad,

This is DEFINITELY one of your most interesting pieces of art!!! I really like it. It's asymmetrical and makes the eye stay around to look at the details and figure out what's going on. It's not as "clear" to immediately understand what it is. Makes the brain work.

Love,

"Mybrid"

Date: Aug 9, 2007 2:07 PM
Subject: RE: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

"Mybrid,"

I value your opinion very high. You said exactly the same what I said when I finished the work, contrary to my wife. Obviously, one can not expect any intelligent comment from a person, who has no taste, nor satisfactory educational background in art.

Love,

Dad

Date: Aug 9, 2007 3:11 PM
Subject: Re: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

Dad,

Your wife doesn't have the same taste and appreciation of surrealistic art as we do. Sometimes I do wonder why you married her. ;-)

"Mybrid"

Date: Aug 9, 2007 3:52 PM
Subject: RE: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

I also wonder...

Summer Camp is approaching

2007-08-07T18:30:00.000-04:00

We're back to the story of my unemployment - Day 2.

As you all may recall, I signed up to go to camp. Tuesday evening was the party for the local counselors who'll be heading to the same camp. The party was in D.C. held at someone's private home. Of the counselors that were invited I only knew the directors of the local chapters. Everyone else seemed to have met one another at previous camps.

Within the first five minutes at this party it turned out that the owner of the house is an instructor at the same University I graduated from, and from the same Department! We knew the same teachers.

Within the next five minutes I found that one of the counselors is a student at another University and is a student of someone I worked with who's a very good friend of mine.

So here were two completely unrelated coincidences, that were not connected in any way to the camp I'm going to. Sure, the term "small world" comes to mind, but this is just too incredible that in the several millions of people living in the area of DC/Maryland/Northern Virginia - that I'd meet two people in one party who'd be so close to my own history. It's not like there's only one University in this area. It's not like there's only one university teacher in the metropolitan area. And it's not like there's only one place you can study this major.

Overall I was a bit overwhelmed at the party because everyone were talking about all these American games they plan for the camp, and I'm not too well versed in American games. When I asked the guys to explain to me what Capture the Flag is, the guy answered me "it's like a game of Tag," to which I responded, "You must think I know what Tag is!?!" I had to launch into an explanation that as an Israeli I can teach them How to Capture a Terrorist, but don't know the rules to How to Capture the Flag. From the laughs I got, I think I'll be providing many more laughs at camp just from sheer ignorance of American camp culture.

I'm terrified about all these games they plan and songs, and numerous other things I'm not familiar with. In self defense, I called my nephews back in Israel and requested them to teach me songs in Hebrew from camp, and Israeli games. I plan on turning the tables and teaching THEM some Israeli games. I now have 58 pages of printed material with games from the Israeli scouts.

Oh and the Hebrew song I plan to teach the kids at camp: La'Dod Moshe Hayta Chava. You're all familiar with this song, but you just don't realise it. Hint: the next line goes: E I E I O.

He's like a son to me

2007-08-07T03:10:00.000-04:00

The photo below was taken this week in Eilat, Israel. The Red Sea in the background. This is my favourite nephew in the world. I love this kid to death and would drop everything in the world if he ever asked me to. He's like my own son and everyone in the family knows how I feel about him.

The "kid" you see here (he turns 18 in two months), has a heart of gold. He's the most popular in his school, has the highest grades at his school, and was recently invited for the most elite brainy unit in the IDF - a unit that only takes the brightest soldiers with the highest exam scores in the country. Last week he completed a training course to become a scout leader in Israel (our scouts are co-ed and VERY different from the American scouts). This was at the request of younger kids who love him and wanted him to be their leader.

But what amazes me most about him is that he's six years older than his younger brother and unlike his father (my brother) has not teased him or hit him in his entire life. He showers him with hugs and love. Always there for him. He's the most amazing older brother I've ever seen in a family. Whenever I see the three of them together I'm blown away by how well they get along and enjoy each other's company. They always find things to do together and they have a ton of fun doing it.

Every time someone tells me about something he's done or a demonstration he's attended, I just want to go over and give him a hug for being the most wonderful person I know. The last demonstration he's attended - he drove all the way to Tel Aviv to join a mass protest against the government's mistreatment of Holocaust Survivors living in poverty. To remind everyone, Holocaust Survivors in Israel are in their 70's, 80's and 90's. And here's a young 17 year old who cares about them!

The Lunch Invitation

2007-08-06T19:06:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I thought I'd write one post to sum up two weeks of unemployment, and somehow that post turned out to be one day's worth. I feel like I may have disappointed my readers in not engaging them more by asking them - have YOU dealt with irate customers? I suspect this could be a whole long discussion sometime. But I'm thinking I'll leave it for the first time I've actually experienced it.

So we're off to Tuesday. My second day of unemployment. I was invited by the director of a local chapter of a certain charitable organization for lunch. Those of you who know me, can guess which one and where, but for different reasons I am not mentioning those details in public.

I got there at 11:30am as was agreed. They sat me down on the guest chair and got straight to business. Within the first five minutes I was requested to be on the planning committee for a fundraiser walk, and when they realised I wasn't very awake yet, they threw in an invitation to be a member of their Board of Trustees! My initial reaction was "Excuse me???" I was just blown away by their invitation. No elections. No effort. Just outright invitation followed by a list of reasons why they want me. I was flabbergasted that they thought I was a good choice. I was overwhelmed with the offer. I was humbled by the occasion. I didn't know what to say, other than, "I hope I won't disappoint you, because I do not have any capabilities of engaging in fundraising." (read: I HATE asking people for money!!!) They immediately set me straight and explained my role would not involve that aspect of being a Board of Trustees member.

Lunch was just a way for them to say "Thank You for saying 'yes,'" I think. It was a good lunch, too.

On my way home I had to call the director of a different local chapter in order to set a time to meet with her that night - that's when I was faced with yet another invitation, or more of a request. "I know you're unemployed now, and you wouldn't mind coming by to help us out. And you wouldn't say "no" to us, so when are you coming?"

Needless to say, I've been spending some of my unemployment days in ...an office, working my ass off. I absolutely LOVE volunteering and helping. If my husband wins the lottery I'd do it full time. But I can't consider it at this point in my life because I really want to do project management above all.

This post only covers Tuesday until 6pm. Another post will cover Tuesday evening.

The Job Interview

2007-08-04T18:30:00.000-04:00

I don't even know where to begin with everything that I've been doing in my "retirement."

I suppose I can do it chronologically.

The first Monday of unemployment began with an interview with my possibly-future-client. Due to the nature of this client, they will be referred to as "The Department-That-Must-Not-Be-Named" - TDTMNBN (whoa, that's too long, I'll shorten it to DNN - department-no-name). That was a fun interview. 40 minutes of drilling me about my work experience. At the end they were nice enough to say, "do you have any questions for us?" I blinked and said, "Sure. I'd like to hear more about the project you plan on putting me on." The response, typical of DNN, "Except that. We can't answer that question due to the nature of this department." So yeah, I'm headed to a job I don't know when I'm starting and when I start I won't know what I'll be doing. It sounds absolutely fantastic. I mean truly - a fantasy of a job. I can't wait.

Unfortunately, they feel they can wait. Working for DNN requires some special paperwork and bureaucracy to go its course. They've had mine since April 13th. They're dying to get me on board, but they have no control of their sub-department-that-must-not-be-named to get this processed faster.

It was a wonderful Monday. I'm really looking forward to work for this client. Particularly because he asked me the most intelligent question I've heard in nine years of employment at the previous company - "Are you a member of PMI?" and "Are you a licensed PMP?" Finally, someone who appreciates my credentials. Another question that made me feel like jumping over the table and kissing the man - "What tools do you use in your management?" The smile on his face when I mentioned Microsoft Project, Microsoft Access, Microsoft Excel and anything the client prefers - made him almost hyperventilate from excitement.

But my absolute favourite question - "Have you ever dealt with irate customers?" and "How have you dealt with confrontations or conflicts with the clients?" That's when I gave him a blank stare and asked the dumb question, "What do you mean irate customers?" So he tried to gently warn me that should I take this job I'll be dealing with customers who'd confront me about being six months late on a delivery, not getting what they wanted, not doing what they say, etc. He was worried about me internalizing everything and not having the tools to deal with irate customers. I answered with all honesty - "No, I've never dealt with irate customers. Maybe because I always give them what they want?" That put a smile on his face. Then he asked how I'd deal with an irate customer, I told him that's an easy answer, "I'll go back home and take it all out on my husband!" This got them laughing and all happy about my method of dealing with stress. I then added that the way I deal with customers is proactive, to ensure they're not irate - by informing them about any schedule delays and budget overruns immediately upon knowing about it, because I know customers don't like surprises. This answer made them smile and put a check mark on their paper. I dunno - this really isn't brain surgery. Wouldn't everyone say the same?

After that interview I went back to my previous client to return my badge, and told them about this question. The client looked at me with this look of astonishment, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME????"..."Of course you've dealt with irate customers!!! What would you call....and....and...and..." I just stood there baffled and said, "I didn't think they were irate. I completely understood why they were frustrated and they had every right to be irate."

I can't wait for my first irate confrontation. I'm getting all hyped up for this job.

To those who commented

2007-08-01T08:18:00.000-04:00

I want to thank everyone for taking the time to respond to my question from yesterday. Your responses and suggestions were more helpful than any google search I could have done.

I got a card and wrote on it our condolensces, offered our help and signed it with our full names, address, phone numbers and email. Then I went over and knocked on the front door. I had already met our neighbour's daughter one time briefly as we said hello over our yard's fence from a distance in our first week here. She answered the door and I expressed my sadness and gave her the card. She said she didn't remember our names and I told her I wrote it in the card in case she needs any help. It seemed like she and a couple of family relatives were cleaning up the house and packing everything. I offered all the leftover boxes we gathered from our house moving. She was extremely grateful for all the boxes I gave her, because her mother had a huge collection of barbie dolls (400+) and other things that needed packing.

I then asked which charity we can donate to and she said The American Cancer Society. And that's what I did.

I know some of you will think I did a good deed, but I only feel like I silenced my conscience and guilt over not offering help sooner. I don't feel good at all. It's as if I did something now just for my own feel good and after it was too late and not really to help a neighbour whom I knew was dying.

A sad event and a question

2007-07-31T16:50:00.000-04:00

I know, I know. I should be standing in the corner for not making use of my "retirement" and post more. But somehow this has become a busier lifestyle than having a full-time job.

I promise to write sometime this week. Maybe even tomorrow. But once I start writing, it'll very likely be several posts in one day. So be prepared to read different things at one time. Or maybe I'll just save as draft and post later so as not to bore everyone.

In the meantime, I need some advice from everyone as I am not familiar with American customs. We moved to a single family home in a wonderful neighbourhood six months ago. This weekend, our next door neighbour passed away. We knew she was very ill and dying, but the only help we extended was shovel the snow from her driveway one time. I feel really bad about not trying to reach out. I have no excuses for it. I know her daughter and her family are cleaning up her house now (I see the trash bags piling up) for the past two days. Do I go over with flowers? A card? Do I leave a card in the mailbox? Do I ignore? I want to extend an offer to help with anything that I can, since I'm right next door and obviously much closer than where her daughter lives. I can't offer any physical help, nor can I cook, so should I just not offer help at all? What's the best way to acknowledge that I'm sorry about their loss?

Harry Potter - NO Spoilers enclosed

2007-07-26T21:52:00.000-04:00

I finally finished reading the book this afternoon.

I will not post anything about it on my blog without a really good warning and a very well hidden post.

If you're done reading the book, do not mention anything about the contents in your comment, out of respect for my readers who have not finished reading it yet and will not admit it in public.

I really wanted to put a different image at the top, but some of my readers open my blog at work, so be forewarned this may not be work type material. I have a secret crush on Harry Potter. I know I'm old enough to be his mother, but still... I mean, com'n, look at him.

Unemployment

2007-07-25T18:00:00.000-04:00

You'd think I'd have all the time in the world with this unemployment deal. Apparently, I have all the time in the world to spend it sleeping, reading Harry Potter, going to lunch meetings, dinner meetings and occassionally check email.

Who has time to blog?!

But meanwhile, I'm collecting a ton of topics to write about. I've got enough to carry me through August.

Not done with Harry Potter yet. I like reading slow, enjoying every written word, going back ten pages for every 5 pages I read, relishing the fact that the series is not done as far as I'm concerned.

Everyone else emailing me asking me if I'm done so they can talk about it - can wait! They shouldn't have finished it so fast.

So there.

Time to go to sleep now.

Here Today, Gone Tomorrow!

2007-07-20T16:00:00.000-04:00

The title of this post is because one of my readers happens to have grabbed my attention with the perfect title for today - MY LAST DAY AT WORK!!!

After 8 years and 8 months, I am done working with this company. Today was my last day. And what a hectic week it's been. I've had farewell parties every single day this week. I'm wiped out.

And what perfect timing to quit my job, just so I can stand in line at midnight and get my two pre-ordered pre-paid copies of Harry Potter, so I can enjoy my unemployment days reading it.

I need to go find my Hairy Potter shirt that I bought at Yellowstone Park three years ago. I wore the shirt last year when the book came out. Can't spoil tradition. I'm going to miss standing in line with "adopted" kids, but maybe we'll find some kids who are need of understanding parents tonight?

In a new twist of events with my quitting a job without anything lined up, I got a call last night in the middle of my farewell party letting me know that my possibly-new-client is expecting me on Monday morning for an interview. Now I'm all anxious and worried about the reason for it. And of course the problem is that the paperwork is still not processed, so I can't start working 'til I get anything official.

I'll write more later this weekend, if I find time when resting from reading Harry Potter #7.

Oh, and one request from those of you who like to spoil it for others, PLEASE don't. I don't want to know who dies. I want to read the book. I also promise not to write a word about the book once I start reading. Nothing.

Hubby's Doctor's appointment

2007-07-18T15:45:00.000-04:00

I was busy yesterday afternoon at a company function when my husband called to give me the update on his appointment. So he left me a message:

"I've been sticked and prodded, and got the Tetanus shot, my shoulder hurts, I don't have a sleep disorder. Also the doctor determined that I don't have ADD and that I'm just an asshole."

Doctor's note

2007-07-16T18:10:00.000-04:00

I've had it with my husband and decided to schedule him for a doctor's appointment. There's just so much complaining and issues a wife can tolerate, right?

Some of you may wonder what took me so long, after all we've been married 14 years. Well, it's not that, it's just that if I trust my husband to go to a doctor I expect him to be an adult about it and admit he's broke (physically that is, not financially). Instead he's visited a doctor just to come back home and complain some more.

Well this time I got smarter. I saw the doctor last week and warned him ahead of time - "I'll be sending my husband next week with a doctor's note. That is, my husband will have a note for you from his wife with all her complaints." The doctor chuckled to that, but I plan to surprise him tomorrow.

This is the letter my husband is carrying inside a closed envelope to deliver to the doctor tomorrow (and I'm dead serious. This is the exact content of the letter):

· Multiple allergies during every springtime (specific allergies identified May 2007).
Medication: Alegra D started May 2007.
· Lower back problems. Treated by chiropractor once a month.
· Occassional upper back spasms
· Occassional headaches
· Joint pains: knees, hands.
· Last blood tests done: August 2005 (elevated cholesterol levels with no fasting)
· Surgery: August 2005. Last follow up: June 2006.
· Highly irritable when hungry (e.g. morning before breakfast, or late afternoon if the only meal was breakfast).
· Easily distracted (symptoms of ADD) – only wife is complaining, everyone else thinks it’s okay when husband interrupts mid-conversation to mention an entirely different topic.
· Unusually tired during the daytime.
· Trouble staying asleep. Constantly wakes up at night due to back pains and other complaints (possibly his wife kicking him at night in her sleep, or maybe it's the dog).

Overall: nice husband, but needs repair and upgrade.

Dreams Are My Reality

2007-07-14T16:00:00.000-04:00

This was one of my favourite slow songs of the 80's. I'd absolutely melt if any boy invited me to dance to this song. I think I melted several times, which only increased the value of the song in my memory.

All my life I've had weird dreams that once shared with a friend became the main reason my friends thought me weird and funny. My best friend to this day still laughs at one of the dreams I told her about when I was 16. My dreams don't make sense. They're not initiated by any traumatic event nor anything realistic. One of those dreams that has my friend laughing to this day was about a fellow classmate, small in stature, who neither of us had any affection for or any type of feeling, so there was really absolutely no reason to dream about him. Yet, there he was in my dream, as I was waiting for the bus at the top of Mt. Carmel, and there he was riding the back of an outhouse on the river behind the bus station (I swear there are no rivers on top of Mt. Carmel! Nor outhouses if you're really curious).

I figured the dreams would become more realistic once I got married. After all, there's no more fantasizing about finding the perfect boyfriend.

Turns out my dreams became even more real than I imagined. About a year after I got married, when we lived in Annapolis, Maryland (a city by any means and not the countryside). I found myself waking up from a dream, and picking up the phone to call the police. About two seconds into dialing 91... I was trying to think what to tell the police officer when they answer my call. So I ran my speech through my head and it took a few seconds before I realised I just dialed the police to tell them that there's a bear riding my husband's pick-up truck across the street and he's running over the school kids because this bear hasn't mastered how to drive a pick-up truck. At this point I was slightly confused as to what I should complain about - the fact that a bear stole my husband's pick up truck, or the fact that someone was driving without a license and running over the school kids. I believe I hung up the phone fairly quick when I realised my husband has left for work already, so obviously he's got his truck with him and I wouldn't have an alibi to the police officer.

Needless to say my husband won't let me live this dream down. Since then every time I wake up mid-dream and want to share it with him, he has this smirk on his face and exclaims, "what did I do NOW?"

It was three weeks ago when I helped a friend pack and leave the country (how dare he?!), and I was seriously sleep deprived when I gave him a ride to the airport at 4am. I got back home and decided I could still sleep for an hour and a half before going to work. Later that afternoon I recounted to my husband the dream I had in that hour and a half of priceless rest.

Mybrid: "I was downtown by the Metro station, and I entered this building there, and inside was a group of young black people, and one of them seemed to know me so he shouted my name across the room. I came over and he asked how I was doing and whether I have a job for him. I had no clue who he was. He gave me a business card and I saw the name was William Smith, but I don't know a William Smith and never worked with one. He then excused himself and went to the changing room. Then the group of people were laughing at their boss who was apparently dancing across a hallway behind the glass door, and chasing a female employee back and forth down that hallway. A few minutes later, the black guy returned to the room with only a towel around his waist, and four snails on top of his bald head. So I told him, 'listen, I'm married and this doesn't impress me.'

Ybrid: "Waitaminute! What did you say he had on his head?"

Mybrid: "Snails. There were four. One pointing at each direction."

Ybrid: "OH! I see."

Mybrid: "Really? You understand my dream?"

Ybrid: "Yeah. It's the four snails of the apocalypse!"

Mybrid [with a blank stare]: "Huh?"

Ybrid [with a look of anticipation on his face]: "Ok, you gotta admit it, it's damn funny!"

Mybrid [still with a blank stare]: "I don't know what you're talking about."

Ybrid: "The four snails of the apocalypse! Have you never heard of the apocalypse and the horsemen?"

Mybrid: "I read about them in Terry Pratchet's book, and I know there's horsemen in Lord of The Rings."

Ybrid: "No! There's the one for Death, Famine, Pestilence and...I forget the fourth."

Mybrid: "I still don't get it."

Ybrid: "The snail of death! Don't you get it? Don't you just hate it when the snail of death comes crawling at you?"

Well, since that conversation my husband has recounted my dream to his family, friends and coworkers. I still don't understand it, because Jews don't have an apocalypse nor do they have horsemen related to an apocalypse. Heck, I don't even know what the word means!

But here's my husband's coworker's interpretation of my dream.

And I give to you my own husband's interpretation of my dream (which he drew on sticky notes during a management class to prepare him for the PMP exam):

Only in DC?

2007-07-13T12:00:00.000-04:00

Can this really happen only in DC?

D.C. mugger turns out to be a hugger

Is that really all they need? A hug? Well then, maybe this country is going the wrong way when it forbids teachers and counselors to touch or hug a child. Maybe that's exactly what everyone needs to prevent them from becoming criminals?

Just a thought.

Friday the 13th

2007-07-13T11:50:00.000-04:00

I've been sitting and waiting for that Jewish good luck of Friday the 13th, and nothing. I suppose the day isn't over yet so I shouldn't despair or convert too fast.

I sent out my global farewell email to everyone in my company. I really wanted to write this farewell email , but I chickened out and thanked my coworkers and friends, ending it with:

To quote the famous prime minister of my country: "I never did anything alone. Whatever was accomplished in this country was accomplished collectively." - Golda Meir

Though I considered another quote:

There can be hope only for a society which acts as one big family, not as many separate ones. Anwar Sadat

But I received advice from my boss who's also resigned to end it on a positive note. So I did.

I received over a dozen "good luck" within the first ten minutes after I clicked send. It's all worth it to resign from a company after nine years if only to find how many people really wished me well and cared enough to write a few words in response.

I need some sleep

2007-07-10T14:30:00.000-04:00

For those of you following my blog, you've already read about my sleep study ordeal. Well I got the official diagnosis today.

I suffer from engaging in kickboxing while asleep. I suppose the doctor didn't buy the excuse that my dog keeps pushing me off the bed and that's why I learned self defense.

I'm relieved it's not related to snoring, or lack of oxygen, because the solutions to those is sleeping with a gas mask on. While I've done it before, I'm not thrilled about the prospect of being hooked to machines while I sleep. After all, why I did sign that DNR form with my will?

The official name to this syndrome is... Periodic (meaning, it happens every single night, like clockwork, but does not occur every single minute of the night) Leg (it could be the arms as well, but they only tested my legs) Movements (no, it's not a musical event) Syndrome (a collection of symptoms - such as falling asleep watching TV, falling asleep in the car, and falling asleep at work). PLMD in short. And no it is not the same as Restless Leg Syndrome. RLS happens when the person is awake and aware of the pain involved. PLMD occurs in my sleep and I'm completely unaware of it.

So unaware that I was quite surprised to find that I have 30 events per hour, which wakes me up six times an hour. Meaning, I never get a full hour of sleep. Ever.

Of course, I think this has all been resolved with the arrival of our new mattress on Sunday. This awesome mattress shapes itself around my body, totally preventing me from moving. It wraps itself around me, eating me alive, and spits me out in the morning in the same position I fell asleep in. No more issues of waking up at night. Well, at least not as far as I know.

Hubby on the other hand has been tossing and turning all night long (so he tells me, and so does dog testify). So now we're in a dilemma, is there a system where you can have half a bed made of the Sleep Number bed (the one we slept on for the past seven years) and half tempurpedic? And will this marriage last a change of mattress for the fourth time.

I wonder if we should seek a marriage counselor?

It's final

2007-07-09T17:53:00.000-04:00

My accusations in my resignation letter have been confirmed this morning. The company indeed does not promote project management. My resignation was accepted via my supervisor who called to ask if I can make my last day sooner than I planned. The conversation he had with the boss totally baffled me because it referenced something I USED to do three years ago, and no longer do (developing databases), and somehow this was inserted into the conversation as if I were quitting because the company does not recognize this type of work as project management. I swear I made absolutely no mention of IT work, and somehow this was interpreted as my definition of project management.

I'm beginning to realise that no matter how long I would have stayed with the company I would have always been seen as a database developer rather than a project manager who just happens to know which tools to use in management and how to actually use them (MS Access, MS Project, MS Excel, Prolog, etc). Apparently, it's undesirable for a project manager to also have technical skills.

Sigh.

Yeah, whatever. Obviously the boss did not understand the entire point behind my resignation. And obviously he has reached the conclusion that within the company's screwed up priorities he cannot offer me the promotion I want. (Notice how I never even mentioned a raise? Because that wasn't the point behind my resignation!).

My last day is July 20th.

I shall remind everyone that I resigned without a job lined up.

But as a strong believer in "things happen for a reason" - a minute after I logged on the computer this morning, I received an email from my future employer that the RFQ I've been waiting for since April 1st, has come out, and the proposal is due tomorrow! This means, a decision about the winning company will be made shortly after (a week or so).

In this strange turn of events it means I may not get the vacation I planned - sitting at home in August and September.

I have to consider negotiating this into my new contract considering the circumstances.

Amazing how things happen all at once and never trickle.

Now I'm under tremendous amount of stress to transfer my work to someone else and remove every porn file off my work laptop before returning it. Don't want anyone jumping into conclusions. And boy am I glad that the former IT guy reading my blog is not going to tell the new IT guy to look for it. (HINT, HINT!)

I'm feeling relieved to be free of the company's bonds, knowing that this is definitely not the right company for me considering how they've dealt with me so far. But I'm also feeling frustrated and disappointed that they didn't get my point which I thought I was very clear about in my resignation letter (right, anonymous?).

I don't know when I'll write the next post, but I'm really hoping it'll be to break the news about my new job. But then again, my new job is with one of those agencies I cannot mention in a blog. So you may all have to figure it out on your own.

I quit! Or not.

2007-07-07T05:11:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, after nine years employment with the same company, I submitted my resignation.

But I didn't resign.

And if you're confused, then join the club.

Here's the short version of it. I had plans to resign on July 13th (Friday the 13th), since my mom tells me it's a day of luck for the Jews. So yesterday morning I decided to finally write my letter of resignation. I wanted to be ready a week ahead.

Three weeks ago my company announced that my boss's boss's boss is retiring, and that my boss's boss will be replacing him. Two days later, my boss put in his resignation. Totally unrelated event. He had planned it, and it just happened that the retirement was announced two days before his scheduled resignation.

This rapid evolvement made me determined to resign by the time I finish my current project (end of this month). July 13th would have made for the perfect two-week notice.

But yesterday things started happening very quick. I got a call from my boss (who knows I'm quitting) that his boss and the retiring boss would like to know what I plan to do after finishing the project I'm on at this point. They had two projects they wanted to put me on, and they wanted to hear what I wanted to do.

I decided for the sake of not misleading them to resign right away. So I double-checked my resignation letter and requested my boss to confirm that indeed the hours on the contract were to be depleted by July 25th.

Within two minutes I got a call from my boss telling me, "No! There's a mistake on the spreadsheet. Your hours have been depleted as of today!" I hesitated for a second and said, "What are you saying? That I'm fired?" He then explained that because he's already told the client that I'm staying til July 25th, that the company will have to eat up the costs of my employment between now and July 25th. He sort of hid the fact that after he leaves the company I'll be left with explaining to his boss why I've billed the last two weeks against a non-billable account.

I packed up my stuff, printed the letter and drove to DC to submit my resignation.

Or so I thought.

Came into the top boss's office and explained why I'm resigning (I wasn't promoted like I asked). I'm not sure what I expected to hear, and maybe I didn't think this quite through. But I most definitely did not expect to hear the response I got: "I respect your opinion, but I disagree with you."

Ok, let me get this straight? I'm trying to quit and you're refusing to let me go?

We have projects for you. We need you. We want you to take your boss's place.

Ok, maybe you didn't understand. I'm quitting because of the past! Because I wasn't promoted when I should have been. I'm quitting because this company doesn't care about Project Management and the focus is only Construction.

I beg to differ. This office has a lot of project management.

But the promotions last year were company wide only for construction managers and none of the project managers were promoted (throwing out names of a few for proper factual impact).

Wait, you're talking company wide?

Boss, I'm quitting the COMPANY! Not this office, not you, not the project. THE COMPANY.

Ok, let me hold on to your letter this weekend, and we'll talk again next week.

HUH?

Have a great weekend!

Ok, what just happened? Did I resign or not? WTF!

Fireworks but no earthquake

2007-07-05T17:42:00.000-04:00

Fourth of July turned out to be better than I had planned. For the past 14 years in the US I've always had an interesting 4th of July, watching the fireworks. This year was my first time in a different state and closer to the Nation's Capital. A sweet chance to go to the National Mall. But I caught a darn cold that kept me away, so I was resigned to sitting at home and watching it on TV with my husband and mother-in-law, brother-in-law and grandfather-in-law.

Watched the entire evening broadcast on TV from the National Mall, just a mere Metro ride away from where I live. And when it all ended, I stepped outside for a breath of fresh air, when I realised, there's a fireworks show right across the street from where I live, and the street is packed with cars parked on both sides, and I'm occupying prime real estate for this show! This show went on for another 20 minutes past the one I just saw on TV. What a surprise and a bonus! At the end of it, I watched everyone pack their folding chairs from the sidewalk, and go back to their cars, and all I had to do was open the gate to the yard and step back in my house. I just couldn't believe my luck.

My dog wasn't as thrilled about the fireworks and for the first time ever actually behaved himself when I took him out for a walk, as he walked really tight and close to me with his tail tucked between his legs, afraid the big monster of fireworks will get him. Needless to say that the thunder storm above didn't help his confidence one bit. This was also the first time we let him outside, closed the door only to be shocked by seeing our dog literally climb and molest our door in his attempt to come back inside. Poor dog was terrified from the fireworks across the street (which of course I didn't know about until after I finished watching the National Fireworks).

This morning my husband's coworker, who also does real estate on the side, remembered to tell him, "Oh, and you know the park across your street has the best fireworks show in the county!" Geez, thanks for telling us a day AFTER. Some people should just learn when NOT to remember anything and just stay quiet for their own sake.

Happy 4th of July, fellow Americans!

2007-07-03T17:20:00.000-04:00

This is my first 4th of July as an American Citizen! And to honor this day, I caught a nasty cold from a green card carrier who left the country last week. So I'll be spending it, at home, in bed.

As my friend would say Ma'alesh.

I was so looking forward to spending the fourth of July fireworks in a different location than Annapolis, MD. I wanted to be at the National Mall this year. Instead, I'll be in the national bed sleeping this cold away.

I love fireworks. Israel is too poor to have large displays of fireworks like they have here, which is of course the reason I became an American. Well that and the little American flag they gave me at the ceremony (if you enlarge the photo, you'll notice me holding it).

My favourite children on earth

2007-06-30T10:21:00.000-04:00

I love seeing them grow. These are the most amazing kids in the world. And I'm not saying this because I'm related to them, but because apparently everyone else thinks this, too.

The two eldest graduated this year with exceptional honors at the top of their class. The eldest is also the most popular in the entire school and is the center of attention everywhere he goes. The youngest is rapidly becoming the social butterfly that attracts girlfriends left and right.

Every time I get their photos, like these, I just want to hop on a plane and go back home to hug them and never leave again! I just love them to pieces. But what really kills me inside is knowing that next year, the eldest one, my favourite kid in the entire world - is joining the army. I just can't believe it. Nor can I let him go. He's just a kid. No one can deny it when looking at his photo. This kid is turning 18 in two months! Why do they grow so fast? Why?

Like a boomerang

2007-06-29T15:35:00.000-04:00

My plan to surprise my husband for his birthday shot back like a boomerang!

I completely ignored his birthday from the morning till after the contractor left our house from installing a cabinet. Then I went over to the room where he was playing his video game.

Mybrid: "So...did you find your birthday present yet?"

Ybrid: "Yeah, a week and a half ago."

Mybrid: "Funny, but it only arrived a week ago!"

Ybrid: "Oh. I guess it was a week ago then."

Mybrid: "So why didn't you TELL ME you saw it?!!!"

Ybrid: "I figured you had a plan."

Yeah, the plan was to hang you, you moron.

An inspiration

2007-06-29T15:20:00.000-04:00

Inspired by the Embiggen post:

Photo taken at Tefen Industrial Park, Israel. Same place as the ones below:

Happy 43rd!

2007-06-19T18:38:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow is my husband's birthday. He doesn't know I've been thinking about it for over a month. I've been intentionally making all kinds of plans for this week including a contractor coming to install a cabinet tomorrow in my bathroom.

Typically I have to think very hard what to get him because it's not easy to get something for someone who buys everything he wants himself. But this year I actually had three different options. The race was between a TempurFlow mattress, XBOX 360 Elite and the winning candidate: An inversion table!

I had consulted our chiropractor for advice on how to purchase one and eventually went for the one that's easily stored in a closet (since we live in a house without a basement for something like this). I ordered it on Amazon and figured delivery may take a while. Turns out, I was wrong. It was at the front door the following day! But here I am standing at the front door, with this huge package weighing over 70lb and no way to hide this in our house.

So I pondered this for a while and came with the brilliant idea of hiding it in plain sight! With the help of some towels I dragged the box on top of them through the front door and then "rolled" it until I could let it rest against the wall. Then I used the towel to cover the writing on it so it doesn't catch my husband's eye. Mind you, I do need to explain that we're still in the process of furnishing our house and figuring everything out, so obviously all the boxes you see in the photo have been there for several weeks now.

This large box has been sitting there for a week now. I've been taking a photo of it every morning. Just for the fun of it. And yup, he hasn't noticed it yet. It's right there in front of his eyes when he walks in the front door every single day. It's right there in front of his eyes when he listens to the messages on the phone, it's right there when he picks up his keys to the car.

I'm thinking about getting up tomorrow morning and not saying a word about his birthday. Then when I get home I'll oversee the contractors installing the cabinet and when they leave I'll sit down and ask him, "SO....did you find your birthday present yet? Because it's been in the house for a week now. Staring at you every morning and afternoon."

EDIT: Woke up this morning, took a shower, got out of the shower and first words to my husband this morning were....."You need to take down the toilet paper holder here before the cabinet is installed." Yeah, this is the first birthday in 14 years that I have not acknowledged early morning. And I'm willing to bet he didn't even notice THAT.

What a nightmare

2007-06-18T17:53:00.000-04:00

A couple of weeks ago I went to a local family doctor with the goal of setting up a file with him in case I ever need something from a local doctor and can't drive all the way to Maryland for it. An hour and a half of a visit, with tons of questions and a thourough examination. At a certain point, out of the blue, he started asking me questions that were totally unrelated to everything else I discussed with him.

I was supposed to rank the answers from 0 to 3. Zero being unlikely and 3 being very likely. After several questions he looked on his monitor and says, "you have one of the highest scores I've ever seen, I'm giving you a referral for a test."

At this point I no longer cared because after being diagnosed only a week earlier with yet another chronic illness, I was so grateful when he undiagnosed me, that I was willing to give him a go at a new diagnosis.

This weekend I spent the night away from my husband. I wish I could tell you all it was an exciting night with this fantastic new lover I found, but as you all know me, I lead a non-exciting life. I spent the night at a hospital in a sleeping lab. Apparently the doctor doesn't think it's normal to fall asleep when reading a boring book, watching a boring TV show, surfing the internet at work or riding in a car as a passenger. Obviously this doctor is so local that he's never had to commute from Maryland to Virginia through the DC beltway and the Wilson Bridge to fully appreciate how boring this traffic can be on any given day at any given time. The only point of interest that I wake up for are crossing the Wilson Bridge because I love watching the construction progress on it, and the Severn River bridge because I love imagining how some construction could improve traffic on it.

Honestly, I don't think my case is so unusual, I've seen numerous people fall asleep as passengers in the HOV lanes. And I'm willing to bet I'm not the only person who falls asleep after two pages in a boring book, or across the history channel on TV, or while reading my blog.

But like I said, I didn't mind this test. Until the morning after.

Like.Oh.My.Dog. Do they honestly think I can fall asleep with all those electrodes attached to my head, neck, ears, legs, finger, chest and abdomen? Oh and wait, did they really think I can have a good night's sleep with the camera watching me all night? And what about that flow of cold air at my face? Was I supposed to ignore it and manage to stay asleep? You've got to be kidding me! Needless to say, I didn't get a good night's sleep out of this test. And the nerve, they woke me up at 5am on a Sunday!

I won't know the results for another two weeks. But whatever the results are, I just really hope I don't have to go back and repeat this test, because that wasn't as much fun as I expected.

Of course as soon as the doctor told me I have a sleeping problem, I'm more conscience of it and can't seem to get a good night's sleep only to end up wiped out and exhausted during the day.

And that's my excuse why I haven't written this weekend in my blog. I'll try to come up with more creative stories in future.

The oddest search

2007-06-18T06:35:00.000-04:00

I've been tracking the keywords that people enter in Google Search before they arrive in my blog, and today I had a good laugh from the search that someone typed in:

If an Escape Hybrid drives through the forest does anyone hear it?

My guess is that only if a tree falls on it.

The amazing internet and a stunning discovery

2007-06-10T16:15:00.000-04:00

Those of you who have been following my blog at least since January this year, have read my post about the Holocaust and how my grandmother survived. If you didn't catch that post, here's where you can read about it.

Some of you may not have gotten as far as the comments, but last month (that is five months after I posted about my grandmother), someone posted a comment on that post. And that is what prompted me to post an urgent request to the anonymous writer of that comment to email me immediately.

No where in my post did I mention my grandmother's first name. I only mentioned her last name and how she got it. And here was this comment written by someone in Colorado who knew my grandmother's full name - Maria Kozdrowicz. The comment shocked me.

I immediately went on eBay and put in the number mentioned and got the shock of my life. There it was - my grandmother's Polish Passport for sale on eBay!

I had never seen her passport before. Nor have my parents! I immediately called them while they were away from home on vacation and asked them if they know where her passport is. They had no idea, they've never seen it. When I told them the story they couldn't believe me. I told them it had her photo, her birthdate, her place of birth, and all the right stamps.

The seller was someone in my hometown of Haifa. A name we've never heard of. Because we were really worried about raising any alarms to him that would cause him to raise the price, I ended up buying the passport for the $45 he placed on it.

I received it this week. A piece of family history is now in my hands again. Along with a very important date stamp which my parents had forgotten - August 25th, 1957. The day they got off the boat in Haifa, Israel. The boat from Europe to Israel, finally making it back home after 2000 years in the diaspora. In two months they'll be celebrating 50 years in Israel.

The person who sold this passport did not answer any of my inquiries of how he got it. He's ignored my emails and requests. I will try one more snail mail effort before giving up.

If he knew the entire story behind this passport and the fake name on it, he would have asked for more money or donated to a museum. There's more to my grandmother's story than what I wrote. In June 1976, my grandmother's brother got on a flight from Tel Aviv to Paris. Yes, it was that flight. My great uncle was one of the hostages. That's an entire post in itself.
My grandmother's other brother received a medal of honour from General de Gaulle. Yes, another entry for a post. A third brother wrote a book about his survival at a Ghetto as a doctor, a book that I read once and will never forget (unlike hundreds of other books).

This grandmother is the mother of the painter whose paintings you've been seeing on this blog. And yes, she's the one with the talent and where it all came from.

I have the passport with me now. But how do I thank an Anonymous writer? How can I ever thank him for doing a random search on Google for my grandmother's name and coming across my blog and being gracious enough to put a comment? How do I tell him that he stumbled upon one of those fascinating stories and not just a passport for sale? How do I tell him that he helped a family close a chapter in its history?

My grandmother passed away almost ten years ago, of Alzheimers. May she rest in peace and may her life's memory live forever on this blog.

You won't see this on TV

2007-06-10T05:55:00.000-04:00

This movie was made by visitors to the Kruger Park in South Africa. Kruger Park is the type of Park where you visit for several days to watch all of Africa's wild animals. This video is absolutely amazing for its contents. I guarantee you won't be disappointed. I've never seen anything like it on TV or in real life (I've been to Kruger Park a couple of times).

Love at first sight

2007-06-05T08:25:00.000-04:00

Three year old Yang Yang kissing a Beluga whale.

I love this photo. It amazes me to see a three year old human act without fear to large creatures in nature.

And then it amazes me to see a three year old run away screaming from my loveable cute dog as if he was a monster. Poor doggie.

Where does hatred begin?

2007-06-03T15:24:00.000-04:00

For those who wonder where the hatred begins, here's a video to demonstrate a point:

Does anyone truly believe it's the nature of 5 year old to shout that death is a noble cause? Does any other nation teach their kids to hate this much? And the world is quiet and allows yet another generation of terrorists to grow up and get trained to die in the name of Allah. As long as this continues, there's no hope for peace in the Middle East.

No hope, if 5-year olds are taught to hate and die.

Hungry as a Diving Tiger

2007-06-03T08:30:00.000-04:00

Photos taken from http://english.pravda.ru/photo/report/diving_tigers-1817/2/

Wonders of Medicine

2007-06-02T07:20:00.000-04:00

I had enough with my husband sneezing, coughing and being overall cranky every year during spring, and decided to set an appointment for him with an allergist. The lady on the phone explained to me he's not to take anti-histamines 'til he sees the doctor (four days away). So I emailed him with the day, time, place and directions. But since he doesn't read my emails, or reads them partially, he only read the day and time. Never read the directions. He took an anti-histamine the day before the appointment. Mid-day I said to him, "You didn't take any pills did you?" Of course he said, "why?" I pointed out to him that there was more to that email.

Didn't really matter. He went to the doctor. Doctor stuck him with seven bricks of tests on his back (each brick contains eight needles with different allergens). Then he was instructed to sit still for 20 minutes. A week later my husband still has a nice pattern of mosquito bites all over his back. Turns out he's allergic to pretty much everything under the shining sun except very few critical living things: rabbits, horses, dogs and wife. Oh, and he can tolerate dust and mites - thank dog, because I'm getting a divorce if he starts demanding that I dust the house daily.

Finally I have a normal husband back in my life. No sneezing, coughing, or crankiness.

***********************

I signed up for a summer camp. Never been to a summer camp before. My Polish mom was too worried about my health to send me to a summer camp. So I figured I should do it before I turn 40. I received the paperwork yesterday. Background check, medical forms, consent forms. You name it. And all this for five days of a camp. But what really frustrates me is the portion on the forms that ask about my immunization record.

Oh blimey, I'm supposed to know what DTaP/DT/Tdap, IPV/OPV, MMR, PCV, HIB is??? Okay, I managed to figure out TB thanks to CNN mentioning it every five minutes this week. But I haven't the faintest what the others translate to in Hebrew!!! I have my Hebrew book of vaccinations which has been filled up since I was born, but I'll be darned if I know the translation to these diseases.

I'm going to attempt to do a free translation from the Hebrew word to the English, and see if anyone can guess the medical word for it:
Ava'abu'ot - Big Bubbles
Shitook Yeladim - Quietening children
Karemet - illness of the cream
Tzafedet - illness of the frog
Sha'elet - illness of the cough
Chatzevet - illness of the Maritime squill
Ademet - redness illness

So yes, I've been vaccinated for all the above, and I'll never be a bubbly, creamy, froggy, coughing, red Maritime Squill (the quiet children never worked on me as you can see). But I'll be darned if anyone cares if I were all these things.

I have an idea

2007-05-28T18:59:00.001-04:00

I was sitting in a restaurant with my husband when I realised there was absolutely no reason for me to freeze when it was fantastic weather outside. So I came up with a wonderful idea to help the environment, stop global warming, prevent the obesity epidemic, and increase Americans' savings accounts.

It is absolutely beautiful outside and finally warmer than freezing. Yet, inside restaurants are freezing their customers. This makes for a very uncomfortable setting to eat a meal. Especially for us thin people who have no extra fat to warm us up. Thing is, after the very long American winters, I don't see why we can't just enjoy the nice warm weather finally, and instead we continue to freeze the inside of all establishments and work places.

So I'm starting a new campaign. Increase the temperatures in restaurants by three degrees. No one will complain with just three degrees. It's hardly noticeable. Those who will complain are those who have too much fat on their bones already and are always sweating and hot. This will make it very uncomfortable for obese people to go eat in restaurants, and in essence will force them to start cooking at home. Now since the main reason they're going to restaurants is because they're too lazy to cook, then if they stay home they won't cook as much. As a result, they'll end up losing weight. When they become thin again, they won't suffer from the warmer restaurants anymore and will be able to enjoy life again.

The increase of temperatures in restaurants will bring more skinny people to these establishments, and we all know that skinny people eat like there's no tomorrow, yet disgustingly they still stay thin. Well now the restaurants won't be losing any money from the loss of obese clientele, and instead will gain a whole lot of very hungry skinny people.

But I'm not stopping with restaurants. Now we move on to the malls and other establishments. We raise the temperatures by just a little bit. Enough to make one heck of an impact on the excess usage of electricity in this country, but not enough to collapse the capitalism on which it's built. As a result we will have very slight differences of temperatures between the outside and the inside. Kids will grow up not really noticing much of a difference if they go outside, and consequently will decide to spend more time playing outside. Bonus: childhood obesity is halted with a brilliant plan of luring kids to play outside in the nice weather, which just happens to be very slightly different from the weather inside the mall.

Another small bonus: the obese people who typically sweat a lot, will sweat even more, therefore losing more pounds from a stay at the mall.

But let's not stop at the mall, we'll encourage people to reduce their usage of electricity by keeping the houses warmer just a tad bit. Show them the huge savings they make over a year by doing so. Maybe give them some incentives through the electricity companies for saving every year. Sort of like the incentives they give to commuters who opt to give rides to others. People will learn to save and not just money, but the global environment!

For those of you who think this post is anti-fat-people, you're wrong. It's not all about you. It's about me. Always is. I've had enough of suffering from being so thin and always cold. And I'm going to do something about it!

When my nephew was three years old, he'd get quite excited and turn a bit loud. His parents would guide him gently to lower his voice. He's a quick learner. One day his mom took him to shop for food and as they were standing in line, there was a mother and a small girl in front, and the girl was quite loud. My 3-year old nephew went over, tapped on her shoulder and said, "Turn it down a notch."

Well, in that spirit I will name my campaign "Turn it UP a notch!"

Pirates of the Caribbean

2007-05-25T20:00:00.000-04:00

We just got back from watching Pirates of the Caribbean. I'm not going to say anything that would spoil the movie for anyone, so you can continue reading.

If you plan on watching the movie at the theatre - I highly recommend you don't leave before all the credits finish rolling. And I mean ALL.