Home Owners Associations be Damned

Anyone who's lived in a townhouse development is familiar with the dreaded committee called Home Owners Association. We've had to suffer all kinds of stupid warning letters from ours during the first years in our townhouse. But then 9-11 happened and oddly enough they got off our case.

So here's the story, I'm Israeli, as I'm sure some of you have guessed it by now. This means that once a year the Israeli flag is placed outside our front door on Israel's Independence day. I figure - it's a free country, free speech, religious tolerance, I can do this just like I did for a few years at the rented apartment. That flag gets put out there in the evening, stays for 25 hours and I take it back in. Nothing outrageously huge, just a regular flag you put outside the house. Much like seasonal flags or the American flags we now see all around us.

This one year, about a month after Israel's independence day we got a letter from the HOA that said "Remove the flag from the front of your house." So we're sort of baffled, because when we got the letter there was no flag out there. Though, admittedly we did put up the American Flag on Memorial Day, a few days earlier. So we decided to attend the HOA's meetings and find out who's the moron that sent us this letter.

Then the head of the HOA at the time tells me someone complained about my Israeli flag. And I'm standing there confused because I know all my neighbours, and everyone loves Israel and no one has said a word to me about my flag being out there for 25 hours. So now I look suspiciously at all my neighbours wondering, who's the bleeding antisemite who doesn't understand the American constitution and what America stands for.

So I dismissed this incidence as an antisemite event, and for some calendar issues did not put up the flag for another year. But after Memorial day, comes 4 of July. Well, lo and behold, we get another letter telling us to remove the flag from the front of our house. This time with a quote that states nothing is allowed to be added to the front of the townhouse without explicit permission from the HOA. So now, I felt all better, and realise we're dealing not only with antisemites but unpatriotic HOA. A year later, I put out my flag again and yup, got another letter. So that 4th of July, my husband decided we are not going to comply with their *@&ing rules that require us to get permission to put anything on our front lawn. So he took the initiative to send them a message:

Yes, those are small American flags, commemorating 225 years to the Unites States of America.

Our neighbours loved this so much that they've been asking us to do this ever since.

Then we went on the offensive and got our beloved neighbours rallied up as we decided to start a petition, with the knowledge that if 75% of the homeowners sign it, it will be approved by the HOA. The petition requested permission to put a flag out by the front door. We took our time with this petition, we were in no rush (the next holiday was not for another ten months).

Then 9-11 happened. A week later, my husband approached the president of the HOA and with considerable restraint, said to him, "Look, you're going to become extremely unpopular if you make us go through this ridiculous petition, while the entire country is hanging out the American flag."

Well, the flags went up on every townhouse, and no one said a word to us or anyone else since. The president resigned within a couple of months. Hasn't shown his face in a meeting, since. The homeowners manual received an addendum within a few months allowing for flags to be put out. (Amazing what this country has to go through before some people realise how ridiculous their rules are).

So what had me talking about this? Yes, you guessed it, once again we got another letter. This time it wasn't personal. This time, the entire development got a letter, not from the HOA but from the management of this Development, may they rot in hell.

Six days ago a letter was attached to our door. To paraphrase this letter (which I threw to the trash upon receiving) - "Remove your car from the parking lot on Tuesday July 26 from 7am till the following day at 12pm, we are going to repave the road."

So you're thinking, "What's the big deal?" Well, here goes - our development is off the highway. We were already warned that if we park our cars on the highway, they'll be towed. The side street in this development which is scheduled for Wednesday's paving can contain 10 extra cars across the houses. 6 of which are already taken by people who have 3 cars per townhouse. Our street has seventy (70!) cars that will need to find a parking spot WHERE????????

God forbid they actually put some planning and scheduling into this fiasco and have this done in phases, or at least told us where we could park alternatively, particularly the handicapped among us! (Yes, I have a handicapped sticker, but because I always have a spot across my front door, I never use it).

Here's the personal problem - we have three cars (my husband's two gas guzzlers and my environmentally friendly Mybrid, which is in the shop as of this morning, so I have a rental). The additional problem - my mother-in-law is visiting till Wednesday, with her car. Solution: "The car shuffle" game. Husband drives one Jeep to shopping center half a mile away, I follow him, pick him up and bring him back. Then husband takes his mom's car, drives it to the shopping center, I follow him and pick him up.

Tomorrow's logistics will involve, us communicating at what time we plan to be home so one of us can park at the shopping center and the other will bring us both home. I suppose we can ask my poor mother-in-law who just had surgery to stand outside and keep a spot for us while we pick each other up.

I don't envy the family who's gone out on vacation for two weeks, and did not get this warning on time. Because the letter clearly stated "...or your car will be towed at your expense."

Funny thing - we found out our neighbour is now the vice president of the HOA, and HE didn't know about this letter going out. Gotta love a management company that doesn't communicate with the HOA. And then they wonder why no one ever volunteers to be active in these committees?!

Oh yeah, I sense some heavy shouting and screaming tomorrow out on our street. Wish I didn't have to go to work tomorrow. I'll have to ask my mother-in-law to sit by the window all day and give me hour-by-hour accounts of what's going on while I'm at work.