Price per Inch

My friend offered to sell me his 42" Plasma Screen TV. Another friend who shall remain nameless (MP is his nickname on this blog) has offered his expertise in mounting it to the wall at our new house and hooking it all up to a Media Center computer and dish washer. (At least that's what I gathered from all tech talk I had to endure this weekend).

As we were sitting in the living room measuring the space and discussing the size of the TV, my friend was attempting to persuade my husband to go for a 50" screen rather than the 42" my other friend was selling. My husband feeling torn between one decision and another asked for the price on the 50". When he found out the price difference he said, "That's about $100 per inch!"

In total shock I exclaimed, "I wonder where else I'd be paying a $100 per inch???"

Apparently my friends haven't known me long enough to expect this remark from me. My husband just smirked with that knowing smile, "Welcome to my world!" When we said farewell to them, I promised my friend to update her if I find a place where you can pay by the inch. My husband chimed in that he's already in debt and owes me.

48 hours later I made the decision for my husband (with his agreement) and we settled on buying the 42" plasma screen TV from my friend. The subject of the email I sent my friend: "Improve your Sex Life":

Sell your TV and we guarantee your sex life will improve. No need for Viagra or Cialis. You don't even have to spend money on Hoodia. For $39.40 per inch and we can guarantee your sex life will be forever changed. No prior prescription needed. Order from the privacy of your home. Sell it to us today and eliminate financial stress. Free, today only. Don't get turned down again! In a tight squeeze for cash, we can help. Last chance. Drive off with a Special Deal. Get big Fat Paycheck with us. Upgraded TV for the whole family. Just not yours. Free cash For Little Effort. Broke? Get cash Now. Depression interfering with your social life. GEt rid of the TV. Improve your quality of life. For a good time, contact us. Just $39.40 per inch. Last offer. Delivery tomorrow.

On second thought, with 3 girls maybe you should keep the TV?
On third thought - sell us the TV OR the girls!

BEST AND FINAL OFFER!

So MP, sorry to disappoint. Father of the Brides, Mazal Tov on a successful sale!