Catch up time

I'm recovering from surgery and I'm on pain medication now. Perfect opportunity to update my blog (only because Michigan Mike requested). More about this surgery in a separate post (gotta keep up with my father's speed of drawings).

This is going to be one of the more disjointed posts because pain prevents me from thinking in a logical and straight line of thought.

I signed up for text messages from the county where I live. It sends me text messages about the weather and traffic. I thought it was a brilliant idea back when I registered and needed to know if it's going to rain heavily or not. Then I got this text message that had me laughing: "Traffic to Wilson Bridge is stopped due bridge opening for tall boat passing." I love it! Now I know when the tall boats are passing by. It's a dream come true. I no longer have to carry my camera around 24/7 expecting it to open any minute. I can just wait for the text message. Now if only I could train this messaging system to notify me of deer crossing street, ninja squirrel coming down the highway, or black bear sighting.

One evening I was laying in bed reading a book, while my husband was doing his nightly Washington Post crossword puzzle, when I had an urge to visit the bathroom. Typically, my husband is very engrossed in these puzzles and doesn't even answer me when I talk to him. Obviously, me going to the bathroom didn't require any kind of warning or talking, so I just got up and walked towards my bathroom when I noticed my husband put down his newspaper and got up to walk to the second bathroom. I looked at him in puzzlement and said, "What's this? Is it like yawning? When one person yawns the other yawns, too? Have we been married so long that we synchronize our bathroom visits, too?"


Since the weather turned much warmer than freezing, we've been keeping the back door open so the dog can go out whenever he desires. Of course that means that we get flies coming into our house on a regular basis. Sometimes it's really difficult to fall asleep with a damn fly in the bedroom. One evening when my husband was already in bed working on his puzzle, I turned off all the lights in the house and was ready to go to the bedroom when I heard my husband ask me for "Fly Swatter." So I responded back saying, "I have no idea where we packed it, just use your shoe." I think I heard my husband mutter some swear words at my response, when I entered the bedroom. I was a bit baffled by his annoyed reaction, when he anunciated it very slowly, "I asked for some I-C-E W-A-T-E-R!"

Back from Camp - Notes to Self

I got back on Saturday. I hereby enclose some Lessons Learned, in case I think about doing this again.

• Driving north 3.5 hours with two passengers in the car doesn't mean it'll take you that fast to drive back south. Check traffic congestion in Philadelphia before launching on a 5.5 hour drive back. Alone.

• You know you catch colds easily. You were very well prepared with Coldeeze and Vitamin C, but what were you thinking when you neglected to pack the Tylenol Cold to treat the symptoms of a cold?!

• When the Recommended Packing List suggested warm blankets and sweatshirts, don't ignore it, even if the temperatures have been in the 100's the week prior to camp!

• 15 year old girls do not sleep. Deal with it. Don't bother trying to figure out what they talk about all night long. You were 15 years old once, your mother didn't understand it either.

• Adults act like adults, kids act like kids. If you prefer kids, stick to them the entire time and don't bother messing with the adults and their cliques.

• That was a brilliant idea to bring to camp all the most colourful cool pants in your closet. Bring more next time. Kids love it. Gets their attention rather quick.

• 19 year olds are not mature enough to be counselors in a bunk filled with 15 year olds. Question authority next time.

• Don't listen to picky people who claim camp food is awful. Find out if camp's chef does home deliveries.

• After five exhausting days at camp, do not attempt to make your own breakfast. You look rather silly preparing the Pita bread for spreading chocolate over it, only to find out after you've stuck the knife in chocolate that you're holding the wrong end of it. You should be thankful it was a plastic knife and not a steak knife, or you wouldn't be typing this now.

• These may have been 160 very sick kids, but that doesn't make you any healthier. Standing for nine hours while running an activity is not for someone sick. Get a chair. Sit on it. Kids can still hear you.

• When they tell you the camp is in the hills of Pennsylvania, they really mean mountains in Israeli terms. Practicing by walking up and down a hill 15 minutes every morning for two weeks is a noble idea, but not sufficient. Next year start weight lifting and serious strength exercises two months prior to camp. Run a marathon the week prior.

• Shoes bought at a boating store that are meant for water activities are not shower shoes. They do not dry within 24 hours. In fact, they do not dry in 48 hours either. Use sandals instead. Or don't shower.

• When packing your clothes for camp, make sure you pack clothes that can be easily figured out without getting a brain hemorrhage early morning. May want to double-check that bra you took to camp. Something was seriously wrong in its design. Look for instructions. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you feel stumped.

• Kids are cute, but you can't take them all with you home. You don't have 160 bedrooms.
  

Off to Camp

Tomorrow early morning I leave for camp. I'll be back Saturday night. Services will resume sometime after I catch up on my sleep.

I would have written more, but I have a splitting headache from stress.

For Colonel - Let Sleeping Ducks Lie

For those who follow Colonel's Blog, today's show is brought to you by the Letter X:
Click on a photo to embiggen.
And the letter Awwww:

No, they're not dead. They're only a day old! Here's the movie:

To view more photos of Mother Duck and 13 Ducklings, click here. Notice the human attraction that animals bring to a workplace? Slackers - all of them. I was just there to take pictures.

And for the Jumping Ducks movie, click on Play:

An email exchange with my father

Before you read the email exchange below I think I should clarify that my parents have been married for 48 years. In my family's circle everyone knows who is my father since we're so much alike, but there is serious doubt about who is my mother. The only proof she has is that she was in the hospital that day.


Date: Aug 9, 2007 10:50 AM
Subject: Art connected with Poland (cont.)
"Mybrid,"
This is connected with a huge shopping mall in Warsaw (designed and built by Israeli contractor). In nature, the fish is not a part of it.
Love,
Dad

Date: Aug 9, 2007 1:13 PM
Subject: Re: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

Dad,

This is DEFINITELY one of your most interesting pieces of art!!! I really like it. It's asymmetrical and makes the eye stay around to look at the details and figure out what's going on. It's not as "clear" to immediately understand what it is. Makes the brain work.

Love,

"Mybrid"

Date: Aug 9, 2007 2:07 PM
Subject: RE: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

"Mybrid,"

I value your opinion very high. You said exactly the same what I said when I finished the work, contrary to my wife. Obviously, one can not expect any intelligent comment from a person, who has no taste, nor satisfactory educational background in art.

Love,

Dad

Date: Aug 9, 2007 3:11 PM
Subject: Re: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

Dad,

Your wife doesn't have the same taste and appreciation of surrealistic art as we do. Sometimes I do wonder why you married her. ;-)

"Mybrid"

Date: Aug 9, 2007 3:52 PM
Subject: RE: Art connected with Poland (cont.)

I also wonder...

Summer Camp is approaching

We're back to the story of my unemployment - Day 2.

As you all may recall, I signed up to go to camp. Tuesday evening was the party for the local counselors who'll be heading to the same camp. The party was in D.C. held at someone's private home. Of the counselors that were invited I only knew the directors of the local chapters. Everyone else seemed to have met one another at previous camps.

Within the first five minutes at this party it turned out that the owner of the house is an instructor at the same University I graduated from, and from the same Department! We knew the same teachers.

Within the next five minutes I found that one of the counselors is a student at another University and is a student of someone I worked with who's a very good friend of mine.

So here were two completely unrelated coincidences, that were not connected in any way to the camp I'm going to. Sure, the term "small world" comes to mind, but this is just too incredible that in the several millions of people living in the area of DC/Maryland/Northern Virginia - that I'd meet two people in one party who'd be so close to my own history. It's not like there's only one University in this area. It's not like there's only one university teacher in the metropolitan area. And it's not like there's only one place you can study this major.

Overall I was a bit overwhelmed at the party because everyone were talking about all these American games they plan for the camp, and I'm not too well versed in American games. When I asked the guys to explain to me what Capture the Flag is, the guy answered me "it's like a game of Tag," to which I responded, "You must think I know what Tag is!?!" I had to launch into an explanation that as an Israeli I can teach them How to Capture a Terrorist, but don't know the rules to How to Capture the Flag. From the laughs I got, I think I'll be providing many more laughs at camp just from sheer ignorance of American camp culture.

I'm terrified about all these games they plan and songs, and numerous other things I'm not familiar with. In self defense, I called my nephews back in Israel and requested them to teach me songs in Hebrew from camp, and Israeli games. I plan on turning the tables and teaching THEM some Israeli games. I now have 58 pages of printed material with games from the Israeli scouts.

Oh and the Hebrew song I plan to teach the kids at camp: La'Dod Moshe Hayta Chava. You're all familiar with this song, but you just don't realise it. Hint: the next line goes: E I E I O.

He's like a son to me

The photo below was taken this week in Eilat, Israel. The Red Sea in the background. This is my favourite nephew in the world. I love this kid to death and would drop everything in the world if he ever asked me to. He's like my own son and everyone in the family knows how I feel about him.

The "kid" you see here (he turns 18 in two months), has a heart of gold. He's the most popular in his school, has the highest grades at his school, and was recently invited for the most elite brainy unit in the IDF - a unit that only takes the brightest soldiers with the highest exam scores in the country. Last week he completed a training course to become a scout leader in Israel (our scouts are co-ed and VERY different from the American scouts). This was at the request of younger kids who love him and wanted him to be their leader.

But what amazes me most about him is that he's six years older than his younger brother and unlike his father (my brother) has not teased him or hit him in his entire life. He showers him with hugs and love. Always there for him. He's the most amazing older brother I've ever seen in a family. Whenever I see the three of them together I'm blown away by how well they get along and enjoy each other's company. They always find things to do together and they have a ton of fun doing it.

Every time someone tells me about something he's done or a demonstration he's attended, I just want to go over and give him a hug for being the most wonderful person I know. The last demonstration he's attended - he drove all the way to Tel Aviv to join a mass protest against the government's mistreatment of Holocaust Survivors living in poverty. To remind everyone, Holocaust Survivors in Israel are in their 70's, 80's and 90's. And here's a young 17 year old who cares about them!

The Lunch Invitation

Yesterday I thought I'd write one post to sum up two weeks of unemployment, and somehow that post turned out to be one day's worth. I feel like I may have disappointed my readers in not engaging them more by asking them - have YOU dealt with irate customers? I suspect this could be a whole long discussion sometime. But I'm thinking I'll leave it for the first time I've actually experienced it.

So we're off to Tuesday. My second day of unemployment. I was invited by the director of a local chapter of a certain charitable organization for lunch. Those of you who know me, can guess which one and where, but for different reasons I am not mentioning those details in public.

I got there at 11:30am as was agreed. They sat me down on the guest chair and got straight to business. Within the first five minutes I was requested to be on the planning committee for a fundraiser walk, and when they realised I wasn't very awake yet, they threw in an invitation to be a member of their Board of Trustees! My initial reaction was "Excuse me???" I was just blown away by their invitation. No elections. No effort. Just outright invitation followed by a list of reasons why they want me. I was flabbergasted that they thought I was a good choice. I was overwhelmed with the offer. I was humbled by the occasion. I didn't know what to say, other than, "I hope I won't disappoint you, because I do not have any capabilities of engaging in fundraising." (read: I HATE asking people for money!!!) They immediately set me straight and explained my role would not involve that aspect of being a Board of Trustees member.

Lunch was just a way for them to say "Thank You for saying 'yes,'" I think. It was a good lunch, too.

On my way home I had to call the director of a different local chapter in order to set a time to meet with her that night - that's when I was faced with yet another invitation, or more of a request. "I know you're unemployed now, and you wouldn't mind coming by to help us out. And you wouldn't say "no" to us, so when are you coming?"

Needless to say, I've been spending some of my unemployment days in ...an office, working my ass off. I absolutely LOVE volunteering and helping. If my husband wins the lottery I'd do it full time. But I can't consider it at this point in my life because I really want to do project management above all.

This post only covers Tuesday until 6pm. Another post will cover Tuesday evening.

The Job Interview

I don't even know where to begin with everything that I've been doing in my "retirement."

I suppose I can do it chronologically.

The first Monday of unemployment began with an interview with my possibly-future-client. Due to the nature of this client, they will be referred to as "The Department-That-Must-Not-Be-Named" - TDTMNBN (whoa, that's too long, I'll shorten it to DNN - department-no-name). That was a fun interview. 40 minutes of drilling me about my work experience. At the end they were nice enough to say, "do you have any questions for us?" I blinked and said, "Sure. I'd like to hear more about the project you plan on putting me on." The response, typical of DNN, "Except that. We can't answer that question due to the nature of this department." So yeah, I'm headed to a job I don't know when I'm starting and when I start I won't know what I'll be doing. It sounds absolutely fantastic. I mean truly - a fantasy of a job. I can't wait.

Unfortunately, they feel they can wait. Working for DNN requires some special paperwork and bureaucracy to go its course. They've had mine since April 13th. They're dying to get me on board, but they have no control of their sub-department-that-must-not-be-named to get this processed faster.

It was a wonderful Monday. I'm really looking forward to work for this client. Particularly because he asked me the most intelligent question I've heard in nine years of employment at the previous company - "Are you a member of PMI?" and "Are you a licensed PMP?" Finally, someone who appreciates my credentials. Another question that made me feel like jumping over the table and kissing the man - "What tools do you use in your management?" The smile on his face when I mentioned Microsoft Project, Microsoft Access, Microsoft Excel and anything the client prefers - made him almost hyperventilate from excitement.

But my absolute favourite question - "Have you ever dealt with irate customers?" and "How have you dealt with confrontations or conflicts with the clients?" That's when I gave him a blank stare and asked the dumb question, "What do you mean irate customers?" So he tried to gently warn me that should I take this job I'll be dealing with customers who'd confront me about being six months late on a delivery, not getting what they wanted, not doing what they say, etc. He was worried about me internalizing everything and not having the tools to deal with irate customers. I answered with all honesty - "No, I've never dealt with irate customers. Maybe because I always give them what they want?" That put a smile on his face. Then he asked how I'd deal with an irate customer, I told him that's an easy answer, "I'll go back home and take it all out on my husband!" This got them laughing and all happy about my method of dealing with stress. I then added that the way I deal with customers is proactive, to ensure they're not irate - by informing them about any schedule delays and budget overruns immediately upon knowing about it, because I know customers don't like surprises. This answer made them smile and put a check mark on their paper. I dunno - this really isn't brain surgery. Wouldn't everyone say the same?

After that interview I went back to my previous client to return my badge, and told them about this question. The client looked at me with this look of astonishment, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME????"..."Of course you've dealt with irate customers!!! What would you call....and....and...and..." I just stood there baffled and said, "I didn't think they were irate. I completely understood why they were frustrated and they had every right to be irate."

I can't wait for my first irate confrontation. I'm getting all hyped up for this job.

To those who commented

I want to thank everyone for taking the time to respond to my question from yesterday. Your responses and suggestions were more helpful than any google search I could have done.

I got a card and wrote on it our condolensces, offered our help and signed it with our full names, address, phone numbers and email. Then I went over and knocked on the front door. I had already met our neighbour's daughter one time briefly as we said hello over our yard's fence from a distance in our first week here. She answered the door and I expressed my sadness and gave her the card. She said she didn't remember our names and I told her I wrote it in the card in case she needs any help. It seemed like she and a couple of family relatives were cleaning up the house and packing everything. I offered all the leftover boxes we gathered from our house moving. She was extremely grateful for all the boxes I gave her, because her mother had a huge collection of barbie dolls (400+) and other things that needed packing.

I then asked which charity we can donate to and she said The American Cancer Society. And that's what I did.

I know some of you will think I did a good deed, but I only feel like I silenced my conscience and guilt over not offering help sooner. I don't feel good at all. It's as if I did something now just for my own feel good and after it was too late and not really to help a neighbour whom I knew was dying.